Some people think new homes need to be built with private outdoor space such as a garden, yard, or balcony. Do you think this is more advantageous or more disadvantageous?
In recent times, there has been a growing trend of building homes with private outdoor
spaces
, such
as gardens, yards, or balconies. In my opinion, this
trend brings many advantages, including providing a space
for pets, hobbies
, and enhancing environmental sustainability. Correct word choice
and hobbies
However
, it also
presents some challenges, such
as reduced indoor living space
and the additional time required for maintenance.
Firstly
, while
outdoor spaces
offer numerous benefits, they often come at the cost of reduced indoor living space
. For instance
, a home with a garden or balcony may have a smaller interior area compared to a similarly
priced home without outdoor space
. Additionally
, maintaining these outdoor areas
can be time-consuming. Homeowners need to regularly clean their balconies or tend to their gardens, which can be a significant responsibility, particularly for those with busy schedules. As a result
, some people may need to increase their budget to expand indoor living areas
or hire help to maintain their outdoor spaces
.
On the other hand
, having a private outdoor space
offers considerable advantages. It provides a place where residents can enjoy fresh air, host social gatherings, or engage in outdoor hobbies such
as gardening or sports. Moreover
, these spaces
are ideal for keeping pets, offering them a safe and enjoyable environment. Beyond personal benefits, private outdoor areas
also
contribute positively to the environment. By planting trees and greenery, homeowners can help increase green spaces
in urban areas
, which can reduce the effects of climate change and partially offset the environmental damage caused by deforestation.
In conclusion, I believe that the trend of building new homes with private outdoor spaces
is more advantageous overall
. While
there are some drawbacks, such
as reduced indoor space
and the need for maintenance, the benefits to individuals and the environment far outweigh these challenges. Encouraging the inclusion of outdoor spaces
in urban homes can lead to healthier living conditions and a more sustainable future.Submitted by thitiwatkem on
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task achievement
While the essay offers a clear and comprehensive response to the task, incorporating more specific examples or statistics could further strengthen the arguments.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using a variety of linking words and phrases to vary sentence structure and ensure seamless transitions between ideas.
task achievement
The essay presents a well-rounded discussion, addressing both advantages and disadvantages of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is clear, with a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize the main points.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported with relevant explanations and examples, making the arguments persuasive.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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