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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that men and women are equal and so women should be able to do anything. Others believe that men and women are not equal and therefore are certain jobs which are not suitable for women. What is your opinion?

#people #men #women #jobs
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In
this
 essay, the idea will be argued that some people believe that males and females are equal and that women should be able to do anything. Others believe that males and females are not equal and
therefore
 are certain jobs which are not suitable for females.
Further
, my personal opinion will be explained. In the beginning, the idea of equality is not based on adequate knowledge. As I said, the idea lacks information. So , I do not agree with the all subjects. I accept a couple of points. In my opinion,
first,
women and men are balanced.
However
,
this
 impartiality is based on the rights, freedoms, restrictions or constrictions.
Thus
, we are not talking about physical equality.
Second,
naturally, certain jobs are suitable for men or just suitable for women. Those differences come from the natures of the genders.
Firstly
, the equality between species, genders or people who have differences is important and must be maintained.
Moreover
, governments and other institutes have to take precautions to preserve it.
However
,
this
 impartiality is based on rights, freedoms, restrictions or constrictions.
Secondly
, As it said,
this
 impartiality does not come from physics.
Therefore
, some labourers have hard physical power. So , we couldn't agree that all sexes can work all jobs. The physical differences between them distinguish labourers from the sexes. In conclusion, the main subject was elaborated.
Additionally
, my opinion was explained. Balance betwixt species has to be maintained.
However
, natural distinctions are not a subject of that. Because of
this
, labourers can be divided into sexes.
Submitted by ilyascanaltan on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity in presenting your arguments. Re-read your essay to remove repetitive phrases and refine the main ideas.
task achievement
Use more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This will help in making your points more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Try to define your paragraphs clearly, each with a central idea or argument. This will help the logical progression of your essay.
task achievement
The essay attempts to cover various viewpoints, which shows an effort to address all aspects of the task.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good for maintaining the structure of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender equality
  • meritocracy
  • traditional roles
  • STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
  • biological differences
  • physical capabilities
  • gender stereotyping
  • job suitability
  • skills and qualifications
  • diverse workforce
  • legal frameworks
  • societal progress
  • historical evidence
What to do next:
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