It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the social media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media-rich society.

Being immersed in social
media
is
Verb problem
makes
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becoming difficult to escape its influence on
people
's lives. In
this
essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in
an
Change the article
a
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multimedia-enriched society. Numerous advantages of social
media
like global connectivity, it is
cost-effective
Replace the word
cost-effectiveness
show examples
, and
provides
Verb problem
apply
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business opportunities.
First,
people
can connect or communicate easily to other
people
worldwide by using
facebook
Capitalize word
Facebook
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, messenger and various
media
platforms without going to their places just to communicate.
Second,
it costs less to utilize different
media
since one can access it anytime and anywhere.
Lastly
, it offers business opportunities like monetizing videos or posts, or selling and buying things online with just a simple click. With these being said, everything becomes accessible and you can earn from it at the same
time
.
On the contrary
, multimedia has downsides like cyberbullying, less bonding
time
, fake news, scams, hacking,
phishing
Correct word choice
and phishing
show examples
of accounts. First is cyberbullying, where
people
tend to use the
media
to do unnecessary things like making fun
and
Change preposition
of and
show examples
bullying someone online.
Second,
giving
lesser
Correct word choice
less
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quality
time
to family or friends because most of the
time
everyone is holding
the
Correct article usage
apply
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gadgets.
Third,
fake news
also
is evident today with pictures or videos being edited
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
tend to acknowledge
such
news or information from unreliable sources, pages or websites.
Lastly
, scams, hacking, phishing and fraud are recurrent where
people
can open unwanted links that would lead personal information to leak and be used against them. These examples would lead to more problems when using the platforms if not prevented,
thus
everyone should be well informed regarding the use of social
media
.
To conclude
, there are pros and cons
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
using different
media
platforms.
However
, it is up to the
people
how they will use it on their end.
Submitted by dhowardjacob on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, detailing instances of business opportunities or cyberbullying could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, try to ensure smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Using transition phrases effectively can make the essay flow better.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in understanding the main points.
coherence cohesion
The main points are well-supported, making your arguments convincing and comprehensive.
task achievement
You have addressed both advantages and disadvantages, showing a balanced perspective on the topic.
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