It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
A considerable amount of
people
think that some people
are born with God gifted
talents Add a hyphen
God-gifted
while
, on the other hand
, some people
claims
that any Change the verb form
claim
children
can become a Fix the agreement mistake
child
musician
or sports person
by teaching. Correct your spelling
sportsperson
According to
me, if children
are teached
in the right way they surely become better than the Correct your spelling
taught
people
born with talents.
On the one hand, the main reason is that people
born with sport
or music Fix the agreement mistake
sports
talent
someday become arrogant beacuse
of their talents. They feel proud of being talented Correct your spelling
because
that
they do not need to do any work on their Correct word choice
and that
skills
. For example
, one of my friend
was born with Change to a plural noun
friends
sports
skill
. He was very proud that he Fix the agreement mistake
skills
is
different in Wrong verb form
was
skills
from everyone else. Therefore
, he did not do any work on his skill. He became arrogant of
his Change preposition
in
skills
and in
Change preposition
as
result
, he failed badly.
Correct article usage
a result
On the other hand
, some people
claims
that Change the verb form
claim
children
without talent
can be taught to become a
good Correct article usage
apply
sports person
or Correct your spelling
sportspeople
musician
. Fix the agreement mistake
musicians
This
is because they know that they are not born with talent
therefore
, they have to do hardwork
. They are Correct your spelling
hard work
teached
to work on their Correct your spelling
taught
skills
and
be Correct word choice
apply
consistend
and do a lot of Correct your spelling
consistent
hardwork
. They are Correct your spelling
hard work
teached
to Correct your spelling
taught
be remain
down to earth. Change the verb form
remain
For instance
, my brother was very fond of music. He was taught in
the right way to become a good Change preposition
apply
musician
.
In conclusion, although
talent
Replace the word
talented
born
Verb problem
apply
people
are better than the ones that are without talent
however
Add the comma(s)
, however
,
if Remove the comma
apply
children
are taught in the right way they will become good sports person
or Correct your spelling
sportspersons
musician
.Fix the agreement mistake
musicians
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grammar
Work on the use of articles and improve subject-verb agreement to avoid grammatical errors. Edit sentences like "some people claims" to "some people claim".
example
Provide more elaborate and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This will help in making your essay more convincing and well-supported.
vocabulary
Expand your vocabulary by using a wider range of synonyms and expressions. This will help in making your essay more engaging and less repetitive.
task response
The essay effectively addresses both views and provides a personal opinion.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
support
The writer uses some relevant examples, such as personal stories, to illustrate the points made.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?