In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasis that their products are new in some way. Why is this? do you think it is a positive or negative development?
In contemporary times, companies tend to focus on
notion
of novelty in their commercial promotions. I claim that their purpose is Add an article
the notion
convince
customers to purchase their product and in my opinion drawbacks of Change the verb form
to convince
convincing
this
trend outweigh its benefits.
In today’s world, business
sector is extremely competitive. Add an article
the business
Hence
, manufacturers have to update their goods more often. In this
way
uniqueness may help them stay ahead of the race and surpass the competitors. Add a comma
way,
Furthermore
, changes such
as:
new Remove the comma
apply
design
, Fix the agreement mistake
designs
improve
Wrong verb form
improved
the
quality and Correct article usage
apply
develop
Replace the word
development
the
benefits catch customer’s attention, Correct article usage
apply
thus
it
can lead to more Correct pronoun usage
apply
demanding
that will bring more profit for that Replace the word
demand
company
. For example
, Apple frequently offer
cutting-edge mobile phones with the efficiency of the latest technology that Change the verb form
offers
attract
buyers, and Change the verb form
attracts
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
this
company
the most successful sample in their business.
On the other hand
, in
contrary to popular opinion, new isn’t always the best. A number of fresh improvements could bring failure for the producers. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, in my hometown
plenty of home appliances Add a comma
hometown,
face
malfunction after a Verb problem
apply
while
, due to
the fact that their company
change
the prototype Wrong verb form
changed
for creating
something modern, Change preposition
to create
however
, that invention leading
to Wrong verb form
led
technical
Add an article
a technical
defect
. Fix the agreement mistake
defects
Moreover
, establish
the state-of-the-art version of a Wrong verb form
establishing
manufacture
usually Replace the word
manufacturer
cost
a fortune and Correct subject-verb agreement
costs
also
it is hazard
. If something goes wrong, the Add an article
a hazard
the hazard
company
will face a financial loss that can be really harmful.
In conclusion, although
modern
market left Correct article usage
the modern
the
businesses Correct article usage
apply
no
choice but to become promoted day after day, they should try to beat Change preposition
with no
this
attitude and concentrate on offering goods with
the best quality, whether they are new or not.Change preposition
of
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task achievement
Your essay provides a relevant response to the question, but some points could be more clearly developed. Try to expand on your ideas and provide deeper analysis. Ensure that every paragraph clearly supports your overall thesis.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-structured, some paragraphs could be better organized to improve the logical flow. Use clear topic sentences and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Additionally, work on eliminating run-on sentences and punctuation errors to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, both of which are well-connected to the overall argument. This helps give your writing a cohesive feel.
task achievement
The example about Apple is relevant and effectively illustrates your point. Including specific examples strengthens your argument and makes your essay more convincing.