Do you think it is important to protect animals? What can be done to deal with this problem?

Animals
are unique creatures which are spread based on different
species
all over the world .
Hence
in
this
essay, I will discuss why they must be protected and present some measures that can be taken to solve
this
issue. Nowadays, there are many
species
of
animals
which are extinct because of human activities;
therefore
, we must help to conserve them owing to their presence in their natural habitat. Other than that, their existence can be used both for scientific knowledge development and maintaining an environment that depends on the availability of certain
species
which might have an impact on the cycle of the
food
chains. Based on my experience, if there is an animal missing in a
food
chain, it will damage their cycle because there will be instability in the system of the
food
chain.
Nevertheless
, there are steps which can be taken by us to protect
animals
.
First,
we must build a conservation area to save the
animals
from illegal hunting to avoid more extinction of certain
species
Moreoever
Correct your spelling
However
, animal campaigns and educating people since childhood regarding taking care of the natural habitat of
animals
can build a chemistry between humans and
animals
which will help to protect the
animals
in longer periods of time. In conclusion, we must protect
animals
because they are one of the main subjects which help us to keep the stability of the environment and
food
chain, and scientific purposes by providing conservation areas and implementing animal campaigns,
as well as
environmental education.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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task achievement
To achieve a higher score, try to include more specific examples or case studies that emphasize the importance of protecting animals. It could enhance the overall relevance and strength of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining the transitions between sentences and paragraphs to make the flow of ideas more natural and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your arguments.
task achievement
You presented logical reasons for why animals need protection and discussed practical measures to deal with the problem.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • natural habitats
  • ecological balance
  • biodiversity
  • confinement
  • natural stimuli
  • psychological problems
  • genetic homogeneity
  • environmental changes
  • adapt and evolve
  • survival of the fittest
  • social structures
  • communication patterns
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