The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending

The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending
The pie chart illustrates data about the places of
dance
classes
and the line graph depicts the
number
of attendees of different varieties of dances by their ages in a city in Australia. It is clearly observed from the charts that private studios constituted the highest proportion of
dance
students
.
Furthermore
, ballet
dance
accounted for the highest
number
of
students
among under 11-year-old kids and modern
dance
was the most popular among kids who are between 11 and
16-year-old
Correct your spelling
16 years old
. Private studios accounted for the highest proportion of
students
with 48%.
Conversely
, the lowest percentage of
students
chose the college-based studios with only 10%. The second largest proportion of
students
went to school
halls
Change the noun form
hall
show examples
classes
with only 24%.
Furthermore
, the share of community halls and others was 18% of total
dance
students
. The most popular
dance
among
students
under 11 was ballet with the
number
of 600.
In contrast
, the lowest
number
of under 11
students
attended modern
dance
classes
with the
number
of 300.
Besides
, modern
dance
accounted
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
highest
number
of 11-16-year-old
students
with just over 500. And, the smallest
number
of 11-16-year-old
students
participated in ballet
dance
classes
with the
number
of nearly 300.
Moreover
, the
number
of tap
dance
under 11-year-old
students
was approximately 450 and that of 11-
16-year-old
Fix the agreement mistake
16-year-olds
show examples
was nearly 420.
Submitted by keyhan.mp on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore".
Vocabulary: Replace the words dance, classes, number, students with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 9 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • distribution
  • attendance
  • community centers
  • dance schools
  • private studios
  • ballet
  • hip-hop
  • contemporary
  • ballroom
  • analysis
  • popularity
  • accessibility
  • cost
  • cultural trends
  • media influences
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