Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause?What are the solutions?

In the contemporary job market, an increasing number of older people who need a workplace are finding themselves in direct competition with younger individuals for the same positions.
This
situation brings about several noticeable problems to society, and methods would be used to change the situation. One of the primary issues is the potential for
age
discrimination
. To be specific, employers may have a bias towards the old, labelling them as less energetic and cannot easily adapt to new working methods.
This
would possibly lead them to be ignored, even though they have valuable experience and skills. If the old still have to compete with young people,
this
will aggravate the phenomenon of
age
discrimination
.
Additionally
,
this
competition would
also
bring economic implications. Older workers who cannot find employment may rely more on social welfare systems, causing pressure
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the public finances. It is undeniable that increasing the number of aged workers is beneficial for society as it reduces the waste of the workforce significantly, so measures should be taken to address
this
problem.
Firstly
, the government could set up laws to prevent
age
discrimination
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and ensure that employers make hiring decisions based on working efficiency rather than
age
.
In addition
, training should be available to older workers to help them stay updated with the latest technologies. In conclusion, the competition between the young and the old would bring
age
discrimination
to the older generation and cause economic problems in society.
However
, laws can be set by the government, and trains should be available to old people.
Submitted by 2575444164 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To improve Task Response, consider providing more relevant and specific examples to support your main points. This will help illustrate your arguments better and make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity of your comprehensive ideas by developing each point more thoroughly. Each paragraph should delve deeper into the issues and solutions mentioned.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using more transitional phrases can help establish better connections between arguments and maintain the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which makes the overall structure clear and easy to follow.
task achievement
The response comprehensively addresses the task prompt, covering both problems and solutions effectively.
task achievement
The language used is generally clear and straightforward, making the essay easy to read and understand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Intergenerational competition
  • Age discrimination
  • Adaptability
  • Hiring practices
  • Workforce diversity
  • Upskilling
  • Lifelong learning
  • Flexible working arrangements
  • Ageism
  • Technological proficiency
  • Productivity concerns
  • Diverse skillsets
  • Legislative protection
  • Employment equity
  • Biases
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!