IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

There have been some problems with the bus service, especially its reliability, in your area over the last two weeks. Write a letter to the manager of the bus company. In your letter • describe what the problems are • explain how these problems are affecting you • suggest what you would like the company to do Write at least 150 words.

#bus #service #reliability #area #two #weeks #manager #company
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Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to complain about the
bus
 service I normally use to get to my university campus. Every day I stay at the
bus
 station and wait for
bus
 number eight. But during the
last
 two weeks, I have had problems because it does not come on time. Yesterday I was waiting for more than half an hour and
as a result
 I missed my first lecture at the university.
Additionally
, I struggle when I try to get back home after my classes. Again, I have to wait for the
bus
 and
due to
this
, I arrive home late. When I asked the driver about
this
 problem, he said to me currently you do not have enough drivers in your company,
that is
 why the number of buses on the route decreased.
Moreover
, as there is only one
bus
 passing near my home, I would like you to find a solution immediately. I think you need to hire more drivers and organise more buses on
this
 route.
This
 is why they will go more frequently and I will not have to wait for a long time. I hope my letter will reach you soon and I am looking forward to your reply. Yours sincerely, Vladimir Belitskii
Submitted by samedovateacher on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific details or examples of how the unreliable bus service has affected your daily schedule or other commitments.
coherence cohesion
Try to use more complex sentence structures and varied vocabulary to enhance the letter's overall fluency and readability.
task achievement
Clear and concise explanation of the problem and its impact.
coherence cohesion
The letter follows a logical structure with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph contains a single, clear idea which makes the letter easy to follow.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is polite and formal, appropriate for a complaint to a company manager.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adhering to schedules
  • inconvenience
  • daily routine
  • punctuality
  • frequency during peak hours
  • overcrowding
  • commuters
  • update system
  • reliable
  • maintenance
  • breakdowns
  • irregular bus timings
  • passengers
  • delays
  • unreliable
  • appointments
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