What are the advantages and disadvantages of spending a holiday in your own country compared to traveling abroad? Discuss both perspectives and provide your opinion
Some people prefer to spend vacation within their own
country
, others plan more exotic trips abroad. Inner tourism does not require visa
and Add an article
a visa
on the other
hand
it lacks Add a comma
hand,
variety
of opportunities in case the Add an article
the variety
a variety
country
is small. Compared to that, travelling to other countries opens up a handful of new experience
, but it Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
also
costs a lot more than a holiday spent in your own country
.
Holiday trips inside your country
has
an advantage as it requires no extra Change the verb form
have
document
to move around, Fix the agreement mistake
documents
although
you might run out of options for travel plans. As countries have borders between them, you need a foreign passport to cross the threshold and moreover
it must contain a visa stamp Add a comma
moreover,
in
some occasions. Luckily it is obsolete for traveling inside your Change preposition
on
country
. Despite an
easy access Remove the article
apply
around
Change preposition
to
homeland
, many countries are located in a single timezone or climate area Correct article usage
the homeland
thus
there are not many travel options you can experience. For example
, many Armenians find it boring to travel around their country
and they all come
Verb problem
go
thru
a difficult procedure of getting a foreign passport.
Travelling abroad is popular Correct your spelling
through
due to
the variety of options it opens up, but not everyone can afford its high costs. The planet Earth is huge with different megapolises and far-flung destinations, in other
words
you can find a trip which meets your expectations exactly. The cost of Add the comma(s)
words,
such
adventures is way more than domestic trips,
because you have to purchase aircraft tickets, which are often expensive, find lodging, which will hit your wallet in another currency and if it is a peak season, be prepared to put money on the table. Remove the comma
apply
For instance
, price
range for any 12-hour flight is Add an article
the price
count
in thousands of American dollars.
In conclusion, Wrong verb form
counted
holiday
trip inside your homeland is cheaper than one abroad and it does not require any extra passport or visa, but Correct article usage
a holiday
on the other hand
, going outside your country
will enrich you with memories and experience
that couldn’t have been acquired in domestic adventure.Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
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task achievement
Your essay is balanced and comprehensive, addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of spending a holiday within your own country and traveling abroad. However, some sentences are a bit awkward or unclear. Consider refining some of your sentence structures for better clarity and readability.
task achievement
Try to avoid generalizations like 'many Armenians find it boring.' It’s advisable to provide more varied and specific examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay flows well and paragraphs are logically structured, but a few transitional phrases could improve coherence. For example, use more connectors like 'Furthermore,' 'On the contrary,' and 'Additionally' to clearly contrast and relate ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which ties your arguments together nicely.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your points, such as mentioning air travel costs and the process of getting foreign passports.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?