You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefe
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing
this
letter to express my dissatisfaction about
the kind of accommodation provided as it results in Change preposition
with
very
discomfort and annoyance.
As I recently moved to Correct word choice
apply
this
college and at the last
moment there was no single room left so I had to opt for the sharing
one. For the first week, everything was fine but later Replace the word
shared
on
my roommate started weird things Add a comma
on,
as
at first she always kept our room neat and clean but these days there is a total mess and she plays very loud music at night and it is very hard to get good quality sleep and focus on work. After talking about Correct word choice
apply
this
matter with her still
there are no changes in the behaviour.
It would be greatly Add a comma
still,
appreaciated
if the other arrangements would made. I would rather Correct your spelling
appreciated
prefer paying
extra to live peacefully . Wrong verb form
pay
Private
room with Correct article usage
A private
en
suite washroom facility will work great, at least I would have Peace Correct article usage
an en
at the end
of the day,
I hope this
problem will be takin
into account and will be resolved as soon as possible.
Thank you so much for your consideration.
Yours sincerely,
Ravinder KaurCorrect your spelling
taken
Submitted by rk366704 on
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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure, consider adding clear paragraph breaks and using linking words between different parts of the letter for better flow.
task achievement
While the response addresses the task requirements, providing a bit more detail about your ideal accommodation and why it would solve the issues could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is suitable for a formal complaint and conveys your concerns clearly.
coherence cohesion
You used an appropriate greeting and closing, which adds to the overall formal tone.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are generally well-organized, with each paragraph addressing a different aspect of your complaint.