IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefe

#room #college #student #arrangement #work #accommodation #officer #situation
Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing
this
 letter to express my dissatisfaction
about
Change preposition
with
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 the kind of accommodation provided as it results in
very
Correct word choice
apply
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discomfort and annoyance. As I recently moved to
this
 college and at the
last
 moment there was no single room left so I had to opt for the
sharing
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shared
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 one. For the first week, everything was fine but later
on
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on,
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 my roommate started weird things
as
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at first she always kept our room neat and clean but these days there is a total mess and she plays very loud music at night and it is very hard to get good quality sleep and focus on work. After talking about
this
 matter with her
still
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still,
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 there are no changes in the behaviour. It would be greatly
appreaciated
Correct your spelling
appreciated
 if the other arrangements would made. I would rather
prefer paying
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pay
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 extra to live peacefully .
Private
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A private
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 room with
en
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an en
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 suite washroom facility will work great, at least I would have Peace
at the end
 of the day, I hope
this
 problem will be
takin
Correct your spelling
taken
show examples
 into account and will be resolved as soon as possible. Thank you so much for your consideration. Yours sincerely, Ravinder Kaur
Submitted by rk366704 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure, consider adding clear paragraph breaks and using linking words between different parts of the letter for better flow.
task achievement
While the response addresses the task requirements, providing a bit more detail about your ideal accommodation and why it would solve the issues could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is suitable for a formal complaint and conveys your concerns clearly.
coherence cohesion
You used an appropriate greeting and closing, which adds to the overall formal tone.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are generally well-organized, with each paragraph addressing a different aspect of your complaint.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • accommodation officer
  • roommate
  • share a room
  • living arrangement
  • difficult to work
  • noise levels
  • study environment
  • privacy concerns
  • alternative accommodation
  • single room
  • academic performance
  • well-being
  • respectfully request
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