Many people believe that eighteen years old is the appropriate age to finish school. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

People hold different views about whether eighteen years old is the proper time to finish
school
or not. Personally, I agree strongly that
this
opinion is true from different perspectives.
This
essay presents
firstly
why lower
age
is not proper for finishing base education followed by the reasons that higher
age
is not appropriate as well.
To begin
with, to be younger than 18
age
is not quite senior for finishing
school
and decision
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
the right job or
further
education.
In other words
, it is the time for preparation for the university exam
This
stage is vital and stressful to gain future success in own career .
For example
, in Azerbaijan young should choose their professional path immediately after
ending
Verb problem
finishing
show examples
school
through
this
exam. Youngsters usually feel under pressure and think that
this
exam
difinate
Correct your spelling
determines
their happiness in
private
Correct pronoun usage
their private
show examples
life
. In children of lower than 18
this
period can damage
psychologically
Correct pronoun usage
them psychologically
show examples
and physically,
as well as
, after
school
life
begins
life
period requires more responsibility and
this
situation burdens
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
.
On the other hand
, if
this
age
is climbed more
then
individuals can not begin their job.
That is
to say, they are not enable to earn their own money and still are dependent on their families.
This
situation creates much trouble from
family's
Correct article usage
the family's
show examples
perspective because ending
school
later means children need care for
longer
Add an article
a longer
show examples
time.
In addition
, there are
such
families as parents are older and they can not work more
due to
their ages or illnesses.
Consequently
, if the
age
of ending
school
is increased when
evaluate
Change the verb form
evaluating
show examples
economic issues. In conclusion, I agree that
this
is the most sufficient
age
to finish
school
and in future
life
, both receive responsibilities and make choices independently.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic but lacks some depth in argumentation. Consider providing more detailed explanations and examples to support your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Be careful to maintain clear and logical transitions between paragraphs and points. This will help make your argument flow more naturally.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively introduces the topic and your viewpoint, setting a clear direction for the essay.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion concisely summarizes your main points, reinforcing your viewpoint effectively.

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