IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The funds for postgraduate research are limited; therefore some people think that the government should provide financial support. In their opinion, only scientific research should be funded, rather than other less useful subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the latest decade, the funds for postgraduate
research
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 are limited,
therefore
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, some people think that the government should provide financial support. Some people think that only scientific
research
Use synonyms
 should be funded, rather than other less useful subjects. I totally agree with their opinion on
this
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 topic.
Firstly
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, since the COVID pandemic, the global economy has been declining and the government has located most of its resources in the medical areas and subsidies for its citizens till now.
As a result
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, the annual financial report has been showing deficits for years and the people are demanding much more financial support than ever before. Under
this
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 poor economic situation in society, we should think twice before we invest in any academic
research
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 in order to avoid being complained about by our own citizens.
Therefore
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,
instead
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 of wasting money on less useful subjects, we may fund scientific
research
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 which would benefit the next generation.
Secondly
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, there is no question that we have come to an era of science and technology. These fields are vital for
further
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 human development
such
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 as genetic
research
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 which would eliminate incurable diseases in the
last
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 century and artificial intelligence for medical purposes. The development in these scientific areas would surely benefit the historical development of the whole human race. In conclusion, our government is in deficit in terms of financial budget and there is a factor for us to locate money wisely when it comes to
research
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 funding.
Instead
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 of spending our money on some unuseful fields, I insist our tax must be spent on
research
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 which would benefit our own race in the next few decades.

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task achievement
While your essay effectively addresses the task and provides a clear stance on the topic, it could benefit from a few more specific examples to support your points. For instance, you could mention particular scientific advancements or cite studies that have had a significant impact on society.
coherence cohesion
Although your essay is generally well-structured, consider enhancing the logical flow between paragraphs. Transition phrases or sentences that link your points would improve the coherence even further.
introduction conclusion present
The essay provides a clear and concise introduction and conclusion, ensuring that the main argument is easy to follow throughout.
logical structure
The points made in the essay are generally well-supported and logically structured, making it easy to understand the line of reasoning.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your writing is mostly clear and comprehensive, covering the essential aspects of the given topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • postgraduate research
  • financial support
  • scientific research
  • funding
  • advancements
  • technology
  • medicine
  • direct impact
  • society
  • public health
  • economy
  • humanities
  • social sciences
  • human behavior
  • culture
  • ethics
  • context
  • technological advances
  • balanced approach
  • allocation of funds
  • disciplines
  • knowledge progression
  • societal development
  • long-term benefit
  • education methods
  • mental health interventions
  • quality of life
  • interdisciplinary research
  • global challenges
  • collaboration
  • holistic solutions
  • climate change
  • public health crises
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