IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows the changes, which took place in a coastal area called Pentland from 1950 to 2007. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the diagrams below.

The diagram below shows the changes, which took place in a coastal area called Pentland from 1950 to 2007. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the diagrams below.
#changes #place #area #pentland #report #university #lecturer #diagrams
The two maps illustrate the changes
occurred
Correct pronoun usage
that occurred
show examples
 in a coastal
area
 called Portland, between 1950 and 2007.
Overall
, Portland underwent significant development over the 57 years, with several new facilities constructed, existing ones demolished, and wide natural areas removed. In 1950, there were few numbers of buildings and wide grasslands. A
road
 went through the
area
started
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 from a sea
it
Correct your spelling
at
show examples
 the top part.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the left
side
 of
this
road
, there was an industrial
area
 with just three facilities,
in addition
 to
grassland
 in the bottom corner.
While
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the right
side
 of the
road
, there
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 a car park and another
grassland
. Looking ahead to 2007, additional roads
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 constructed, and the industrial
area
 was removed to make way for introducing a
multi-store
Correct your spelling
multi-storey
show examples
 car park, swimming pool and park. The
grassland
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the left
side
 of the main
road
 was replaced by three shops and
cinema
Correct article usage
a cinema
show examples
, separated by a new
road
. There were remark changes in the right
side
 of the
road
as well as
, apartments complex is built alongside the right costal,
while
 on the bottom
corner
Add a comma
corner,
show examples
 two line of houses and three shops are built,
while
 the old facilities and
grassland
 are totally removed.
Finally
, A yacht marine with
road
Add an article
the road
a road
show examples
 around the coastal line
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 constructed.
Submitted by aalahmad387s on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words area, road, side, grassland with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • coastal area
  • transformation
  • landscape
  • land use
  • infrastructure
  • environmental modifications
  • residential development
  • urban living spaces
  • commercial areas
  • recreational facilities
  • economic landscape
  • green spaces
  • natural habitats
  • urban expansion
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