You are a famous singer and you have an idea for a new piece in your mind. Send a letter to the composer/producer and persuade them to help you make it.

#singer #idea #piece #mind #composer #producer

I am Shaghayegh Shadman; we worked together on

Correct article usage

the "sunshine"

show examples

sunshine

Capitalize word

Sunshine

show examples

" piece, which was a massive hit

Change preposition

show examples

last

years

Change noun form

year's

show examples

music scene. I'm writing

this

letter in order to ask you to compose a new

song

for my novel recording which can capture a wider range of audience for both of us.

This

song

has been inspired

from

Change preposition

show examples

a local couple's love whom I met

last

month throughout my travel to the countryside; in my perspective,

this

piece can be

combination

Add an article

a combination

show examples

of folk and modern music, the issue which can hold diverse music lovers' attention.

Accordingly

such

song

Correct article usage

a song

show examples

can be lucrative and rewarding at the same time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and can make a "wine-wine" occasion for us. In my point of view, our cooperation can lead

this

recording to be nominated for various prizes. I have written the

lyric

Fix the agreement mistake

lyrics

show examples

this

piece during the

last

week; in my mind, you are the most appropriate one who

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

give a life to

this

song

as our

last

contribution was extremely successful around the world. Our collaboration in

this

recording will make a big impact on people as you are a virtuoso composer who bears strong musical talent and can create incredible works. I keenly looking forward to your response; should any questions arise, make sure you contact me. best regards, Shaghayegh Shadman

Submitted by shaghayegh95shadman on Sat Aug 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence, ensure smoother transitions between ideas. For example, use connective phrases like 'In addition' and 'Moreover.'

task achievement

Check for minor grammar and typographical errors to improve clarity and professionalism.

task achievement

You provided a clear explanation of your idea and why it would be beneficial for both of you, which adds to the persuasive power of your letter.

task achievement

The letter maintains a formal and respectful tone throughout, which is appropriate for a professional request.

coherence cohesion

The greeting and closing are polite and effective, framing the content of your letter well.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

Dear + name
Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

217 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

collaborate
inspiration
envision
expertise
preliminary
unique
commercial potential
artistic growth
enthusiastic
grateful

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Nowadays, more and more older people who are looking for work have to compete with younger people for the same job. What problemes does this came? What are some possibles solutions?
In our time old people need to work harder to compete with young people in the exact jobs, which makes old people get more tired and makes their lives more difficult, we need to allocate some kind of work for the elderly.
7.5
band
Some people think that hard work and determination are the keys to success in life. Some, on other hand, think that there are other factors behind a successful life. Give your opinion.
Regarding my work experience, during the last academic year in my BS, which is known as ‘The Internship’, the general clinical rotations were deeper in knowledge about Pediatrics, Surgery, and Gynecology and Obstetrics, and my elective program consisted of seven months related to Internal Medicine. Subsequently, after my graduation, my clinical performance was focused on the Internal Medicine field mainly related to critical care, emergency room, and inpatient health care. Additionally, taking specific continuing education courses to learn the most innovative strategies about COVID-19 management and The Fundamental Critical Care Support certified by The Society of Critical Care Medicine.
4.5
band
The growed number of overweight people is puttings a strain on the health care systems in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people thinks that the best way to deal with this problems is to introduced more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Owing to the problems which a growing population of overweight people cause for the health care system, some people think that the key to solvings these issues is to have more sport and exercise in schools. In my opinions, I completely agrees that this is the best way to tackle the issue of deterioratings public health in relation to weight.
5.5
band
You recently attended a conference and you would like to give a presentation about the information you gained by attending the conference. Write a letter to your manager asking for permission to give a presentation. In your letter: describe what type of presentation you have in mind what topics it would cover and how long it would take who should participate in the presentation and where should it be conducted You do NOT need to write any address. You should write at least 150 words.
I am writing to thank you the opportunity for being in the last conference about the advancements of technology in our profesion, that took place in Cosentino's showroom last Sunday.
5
band
Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should pearn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
The demand for educating a non-native language is ever-increasing in the modernized world. A few people argue that the only purpose of learning an external language is for working or travelling, while others believe that there are many more reasons to this trend. Both these views will be explained and given a conclusion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

You are a famous singer and you have an idea for a new piece in your mind. Send a letter to the composer/producer and persuade them to help you make it.

The Greeting

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Nowadays, more and more older people who are looking for work have to compete with younger people for the same job. What problemes does this came? What are some possibles solutions?

Some people think that hard work and determination are the keys to success in life. Some, on other hand, think that there are other factors behind a successful life. Give your opinion.

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should pearn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+