You stayed with a local family when you participated in an exchange program in lreland. You returned to your home country in a hurry and found that you had forgotten to take your laptop. Writea letter to the family and thank them for their hospitality. Describe your computer and where it is,and ask the host to send it back to you.

#exchange #program #lreland #home #country #hurry #laptop #writea #hospitality #computer #host

Dear Sally, I hope

this

letter finds you in good health and high spirits. I am writing

this

letter

for requesting

Change preposition

to request

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a return of my laptop which is left behind there. The

two months

Correct your spelling

two-month

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visit for my exchange course was great. I am

greatful

Correct your spelling

grateful

to the family who took care of me and the hospitality is commendable. I felt like my home there. I had to leave early on the departure day as you know my flight was two hours earlier than

actual

Add an article

the actual

show examples

time and I received very short notice on that day so in that hustle and bustle I forgot my lappy. The Laptop is of HP brand, grey in colour, i5 core processor and

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

specific features. I put that underneath the table beside my bed. It would be greatly appreciated if you could send me the laptop via courier service as I need that for my upcoming meeting and it has all the details of that event. I will

interac

Correct your spelling

inform

you the amount for the sending. I will highly recommend others as well about your services and look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, Lilly

Submitted by rk366704 on Sat Aug 24 2024

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task achievement

Try to include more specific details about the laptop's features to ensure clarity, such as model number or distinguishing marks.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow of the letter by restructuring sentences for better readability and reducing redundancy, such as avoiding repetition of similar ideas.

task achievement

You have clearly mentioned your request for the return of your laptop and the reason for its urgency.

coherence cohesion

The letter contains a clear greeting and closing, which aids in providing a structured communication.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

189 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

6.5

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

hospitality
exchange program
memorable experiences
grateful
brand
model
distinguishing features
exact location
practical value
shipping costs
send back
cover expenses
appreciate

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