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Writing Samples
Band 5

In the present day, remote work has become more popular according to technological advancement and global pandemics. Some suggest that this enhances employees productivity and ensures work-life balance, while others argue it could lead to loneliness and working over time

#work #advancement #pandemics #suggest #employees #productivity #work-life #balance #loneliness #time
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In the present day, remote
work
Use synonyms
 has become more popular
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according
Change preposition
due
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 to technological advancement and global pandemics. Some suggest that
this
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 enhances
employees
Change noun form
employees'
employee's
show examples
 productivity and ensures
work
Use synonyms
-life balance,
while
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 others argue it could lead to loneliness and working
over
Correct your spelling
overtime
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time
Use synonyms
. In the following paragraphs, both points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
 will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. The key benefit of distance
work
Use synonyms
 is
flexibility
Add an article
the flexibility
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 it gives, workers can allocate
work
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 freely and choose any desirable place for
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
, thereby
it provides
Wrong verb form
providing
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 more free
time
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 for engaging
personal
Change preposition
in personal
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 activities
such
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 as playing with
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
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, gardening or having dinner with family.
Additionally
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,
this
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 mode of
work
Use synonyms
 reduces commuting expenses and car maintenance costs, causing improving employee
will-being
Correct your spelling
well-being
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. In terms of social
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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benefit
Add a comma
benefit,
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 it decreases air pollution and traffic congestion
,
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apply
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 and
also
Linking Words
 promotes the economy in digital industries
such
Linking Words
 as social
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
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,
food
Correct word choice
and food
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 delivery companies.
Moreover
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 reducing the rate of contagious infection, especially easily spread viruses
such
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 as
covid
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
 and influenza.
On the other hand
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, there are some drawbacks to consider. Overworking and stressful
work
Use synonyms
 situations can occur,
as a result
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 of the lack of discipline. Separating
work
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 life and personal life could be difficult. Working in the same isolated environment like
home
Correct article usage
a home
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 office every day and lack of social communication can result in loneliness or even mental health issues.
Moreover
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, working online requires effective
time
Use synonyms
 management and technological knowledge, which can be challenging for some people. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
Use synonyms
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
 from home offers various advantages,
for
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instance
Add the comma(s)
instance,
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 flexibility,
promoting
Verb problem
apply
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productivity, more leisure
time
Use synonyms
,
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduced
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 revenues,
decreasing
Wrong verb form
decreased
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financial
Replace the word
finances
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, well-being improvement,
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduced
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 environmental issues and less contagious disease, it is important to consider the potential negative impacts on the general workers. If one has adaptability and discipline, remote working could be an excellent option,
however
Linking Words
face to
Verb problem
,
show examples
face
Correct your spelling
face-to-face
show examples
 communication between colleges remains essential for ensuring good working relationships in the long term.
Submitted by sippakorn.wet on

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grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammar and vocabulary errors. For instance, 'childrens' should be 'children.'
examples
Devote more effort to providing specific examples to support your main points. This makes your argument stronger and more convincing.
style
Use varied sentence structures and vocabulary to keep your writing engaging and demonstrate your language proficiency.
balance
You have provided a balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of remote work.
structure
Your introduction and conclusion effectively outline and summarize the main points of the essay.
focus
The essay maintains a clear focus on the topic and addresses all aspects of the task.
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