Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and gives your own opinion

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In our daily activities,

people

Use synonyms

sometimes have a different perspective to each other. Some

people

Use synonyms

believe it is a good thing to compete with other

people

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

others argue it is better to collaborate. I contend that we need to work together

instead

Linking Words

of competing with each other.

This

Linking Words

essay will explore both points of view and address my conclusion about the statement. On the one hand, the benefit of working together is spending less time to finish the job.

For example

Linking Words

, if someone has a task for creating a website, they can split the errand for backend and frontend.

This

Linking Words

is an efficient way to complete the job in a short time. Managing

people

Use synonyms

to have different responsibilities may be a hard thing to do, but it is worth the effort.

Thus

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, encouraging citizens to collaborate affected the good results.

On the other hand

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, competing with another person could lead to a conflict between them.

For instance

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, in school, a teacher exerts homework on to students create a presentation,

instead

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of distributing the task each of them made the presentation by themselves, and

at the end

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of the

day

Add a comma

day,

show examples

they argued about which slides they would use. Sadly, a situation like that could boost egocentrism for each pupil.

Therefore

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, racing with other

people

Use synonyms

is not a good solution for society. In conclusion, the two sides of the argument about relationships in everyday work have strong support.

However

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, after discussing both sides,

it is clear that

Linking Words

I undoubtedly support collaboration against each other. Collaborating provides benefits that can make

people

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spend less time to finish the job.

ru.kabiru.biruSun Aug 25 2024

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task achievement

Strengthen the examples by adding more specific details to make them more compelling. For instance, the website example could describe what happens in real workplace scenarios.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear, single focus and that each sentence logically follows from the one before it. Your points are good but can be better linked for smooth transition.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing the discussion effectively.

task achievement

You present a balanced discussion by considering both viewpoints, and provide logical reasons for your own opinion.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

innovation
productivity
excel
outperform
advancements
academic standards
work ethic
stress
anxiety
unhealthy rivalries
harmonious
supportive
collaborative learning
social skills
communication skills
sense of community
collective goals

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Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and gives your own opinion

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems.

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.