advantage and disadvantage of being an Australian citizen

Nowadays, having
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Australian
citizenship could give you
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of privileges that many people are keen to have them.
According to
the Department of Home Affairs (2024) since 1949 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of individuals who have become
Australian
Add an article
an Australian
show examples
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
and
took
Wrong verb form
taken
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
citizenship exceeded 6 million. Despite
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
desadvantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
of being an
Australian
citizen
like the high
cost
of living, being a
citizen
offers you many advantages like travel benefits, protection and being eligible for many
sevice
Correct your spelling
services
that the country
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
.
Firstly
, the ranking of the
Australian
passport gives the
citizen
various travelling facilities. Being in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fifth place in the global passport ranking
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
the year 2024 is an indicator
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Change the article
a
show examples
large
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of countries which is 189, that the
Australian
citizen
can go to them easily either without
visa
Correct article usage
a visa
show examples
or
visa
on arrival or even with
electronic
Add an article
an electronic
show examples
visa
.
For instance
, Australians can travel to
Correct article usage
the U.S.A
show examples
U.S.A
Correct your spelling
U.S.A.
and U.K without the need
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
having
visa
Add an article
a visa
show examples
which
is
Verb problem
makes it
show examples
hard to enter
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
if you have a different passport.
Hence
, citizens can plan for their trips without thinking about the
visa
issues that can affect their trip, and they can focus on other details to be able to have a great experience during their journey.
Secondly
, protection for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Australians is one of the most crucial
role
Change to a plural noun
roles
show examples
that the government provide.
Australia
protect
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its citizens
show examples
citizen
rights by the law that
apply
Correct subject-verb agreement
applies
show examples
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
anyone, no matter who they are or what is their position in the country.
Furthermore
,
Australia
protect their
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
rights who are outside
Australia
through the
Australian
embassy, and
assist
Correct subject-verb agreement
assists
show examples
them if they need helpFor instance, they can vote through the embassy if there is an election
happining
Correct your spelling
happening
in
Australia
which will protect the
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
righ
Correct your spelling
right
of voting
Change preposition
to vote
show examples
.
Thirdly
, being a
citizen
will give access to many services that will support you during
you
Change the pronoun
your
show examples
life
. Medicare,
finiancial
Correct your spelling
financial
support for the
elder
Replace the word
elderly
show examples
and for the university students and many other facilities that are provided by the government, so the
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
could have
a
Change the article
an
show examples
easy
life
. These government-provided facilities not only make
life
easier for individuals but
also
contribute to creating a healthier and more educated society.
As a result
,
this
will
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
a strong nation, that will support the country to grow and develop more.
Conversely
, the
cost
of living is increasing year after year which makes it hard for the
citizen
to
aford
Correct your spelling
afford
to purchase many of their
life
needs. the
cost
of basic necessities
such
as groceries and housing has been steadily increasing, placing significant financial pressure on households.
Moreover
, one of the
obtacles
Correct your spelling
obstacles
that prevent some
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
from having their own house is the mortgage rate Martin(2024) stated " It's the increases in mortgage rates that have made the increases in the other prices hurt so much". In conclusion,
while
Australian
citizenship may come with certain challenges,
such
as the high
cost
of living,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the benefits outweigh these drawbacks. The advantages of travelling , preserving your rights, and access to a wide range of public services, provide citizens with many opportunities to improve.
Submitted by okalqusay on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, consider providing more specific and varied examples to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and engaging.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, focus on tightening the logical flow between your paragraphs. Ensure that each main point logically follows the preceding one for a smoother reading experience.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of Australian citizenship comprehensively, demonstrating a clear understanding of the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant, effectively framing the discussion of the main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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