Some individuals say that the main environmental issue of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Whilst many
think that the loss of types of animals and plants is the main environmental issue. I believe that there are more crucial problems for the environment.
On the one hand, the loss of species of animals and plants is an important issue for the environment. Correct word choice
Many
During
the decades, a myriad of types of trees and animals Change preposition
Over
are
Verb problem
have
disappearing
from the ground because of global warming and people. Wrong verb form
disappeared
This
can leads
to serious Change the verb form
lead
issues
such
as food shortages in the future, and deterioration in the health of the population on the planet. For example
, by the research of the UN in the last
years numerous pets died out, hence
now only 40 species of pets are used in agriculture for meat. It means that in the near future
it can induce a reduction in food.
Add a comma
future,
On the other hand
, they are more another more essential amplified issues
which can not wait. Now scientists from all over the world are trying to find a way out from global warming, greenhouse
effect and ocean pollution. Correct article usage
the greenhouse
Issues
such
as these are causing individuals, so they are on
the top of the list of ecological Change preposition
at
issues
. For instance
, by
the report of climatologist Justin Mankin, big countries Change preposition
according to
such
as Saudi Arabia and Mauretania suffer from severe drought owing to global warming.
In conclusion, although
there is a huge problem in biodiversity, there are ample of
more main habitat problems in our time. In my point of view, nowadays global warming and water shortage are the main problems more than biodiversity which can wait.Change preposition
apply
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on
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task achievement
The essay addresses both views but could provide more balanced and detailed arguments for each side. Make sure to develop each point fully.
coherence cohesion
Improve sentence structure and punctuation to enhance readability. Some sentences are slightly fragmented or unclear. Focus on creating smoother transitions between ideas.
task achievement
You have effectively provided a conclusion that summarizes your position on the topic.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly states the two views being discussed, setting the stage for the subsequent discussion.
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