Some people argue that keeping pets is beneficial for longevity while others believe that household animals are not healthy for people to have as companions. Discuss both sides of the argument and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Domestic livestock is becoming more and more popular.
Although
pets
could increase a level of activity that may lead to a longer life, It may cause several hygienic issues for owners.
Longevity will increase If we keep animals
at home as companions. Since the time we will spend both playing and walking with them will increase our activity. The creatures would every day encourage us to go outside for hours which provides us with better health conditions through walking on foot. For example
, when individuals have animals
, they need to attempt green areas where they are provided with not only fresh air but also
active games with pets
like running. As a result
, they have better breathing and heart systems and control under their weight. Thus
, having pets
as companions increases our longevity as well as
improves health conditions.
On the other hand
, there is a problem with hygiene
of Add an article
the hygiene
animals
and their contact with people, since animals
mostly have lots of worms in their fur
, which should be washed daily. Those owners who would not like to take care of and clean their pets
,
may be damaged by these microbes, which leads to awful consequences. Remove the comma
apply
For instance
, when owners do not clean animals
' fur
regularly, they become infected by parasites from livestock fur
, since pets
live at home and are in touch with people.
Therefore
, domestic animals
cause diseases for humanity, If their hygienic aspects are not controlled.
To conclude
, while
the widespread trend of having pets
could impact our longevity through physical activities, we may be infected by their fur
, if we do not take care of themSubmitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task achievement
Improve the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. Make sure to fully develop each point with more detailed explanations.
task achievement
Enhance the use of specific and varied examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more compelling and grounded.
coherence cohesion
Work on logical transitions between paragraphs and ideas. Ensure that each point flows naturally into the next.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the introduction and conclusion to clearly present and summarize the main points of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Provide more supporting details for the main points to make your argumentation stronger.
task achievement
You have effectively presented both sides of the argument, which showcases a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
The essay structure is generally logical, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You have included relevant issues such as the health benefits of physical activity and hygiene concerns, which are important aspects of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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