some pp believe that public buildings should be move out of the city to promote citizen's well-being and better growth, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is a true fact that the population explosion of the
city
is one of the most complicated issues for almost all nations. Hence
, some people
suppose that communal buildings
should be transferred to other places to elevate citizen's life. By contrast
, others think that drawbacks outweigh benefits, which is particularly similar to my opinion.
Firstly
, the benefit of moving the public buildings
out of the city
is that it can solve the traffic jams. This
is because it will decrease the movements
of citizens to public Fix the agreement mistake
movement
buildings
in urban areas. Plus, it also
solves the issue of accommodation for the residents. In fact, public buildings
which are conveyed out of the urban area can be replaced by houses, and apartments for people
to live.
{good idea!!!}
Change preposition
in.
On the other hand
, it would have disadvantages if the city
doesn't have enough communal buildings
. Distance will be a big problem in this
case. For example
, some facilities are necessary for people
in some emergencies as hospitals, clinics, fire station
and so on. They will be late to arrive promptly in several serious occurrences, and Fix the agreement mistake
stations
then
these will cause unpredictable situations. Furthermore
, school is essential for students in the vicinity/ area to move conveniently, and in case this
is real, it will be a significant problem for students to learn. Besides
, office buildings
are needed for citizen's demands. Exhausted gas from transportation will increase highly
because Rephrase
greatly
people
have to drive longer distances, and it will cause more severe environmental problems.
In general, I object to the moving of public buildings
out of the city
because this
planning can cause more harm than profit and it will reduce the city
's prosperity.Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
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coherence cohesion
Be more consistent in using complete sentences. Notice that some sections feel abrupt due to incomplete sentences.
task achievement
Provide more specific and relevant examples to strengthen your arguments. Examples can help illustrate your points effectively.
task achievement
You have successfully discussed both views and provided your own opinion in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a good, cohesive structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.