Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that is fully justified while others think it is unfair.

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It is an undeniable fact that outstanding professional
athletes
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can get paid more in comparison with
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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types of professionals. Some argue that the high
salaries
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are justified
due to
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the unique skills that
athletes
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bring,
while
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others believe it is unfair when compared to essential workers in fields
such
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as healthcare and education.
This
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essay will examine both perspectives on
this
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contentious issue. Some people believe that the high
salaries
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of
sports
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stars are fair because only a small number of professionals possess exceptional talent, and the money is a way to acknowledge the hard work and commitment required for success.
Athletes
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face constant competition and are under scrutiny every time they step onto the field. The media attention is overwhelming, leaving little room for privacy.
While
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there are many individuals pursuing a career in
sports
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, only a few achieve great success and earn substantial
salaries
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. Becoming a
sports
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icon demands extensive practice, skill, and time. Figures like Lionel Messi, Michael Jordan, and Ashleigh Barty serve as role models for the younger generation, drawing them towards the
sports
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they excel in. Considering these aspects, it is understandable why
sports
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personalities earn significant incomes.
Conversely
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, individuals who do not support the concept of
athletes
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making much more money than other professions believe that the income gap is unfair. Teachers and healthcare workers,
for instance
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, have important roles in society but are paid significantly less, sometimes even less than 0.1% of what
athletes
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earn.
However
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, those who are bold and dedicated are the ones who enjoy success.
While
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they strive for their own goals, their accomplishments in
sports
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also
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bring pride to the nation.
This
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huge difference in
salaries
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brings up concerns about societal values and the importance of distributing wealth more fairly among various careers. In summary, I believe that the big money that professional
athletes
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get is more fair than the massive paychecks of movie actors. It shows that
sports
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are really important and valuable compared to other jobs and accomplishments.
While
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athletes
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deserve to be compensated for their talents and contributions, greater efforts should be made to ensure that essential workers in crucial sectors are fairly rewarded.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

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task achievement
Make sure to slightly rephrase sentences when restating ideas to maintain reader interest and demonstrate a broader range of vocabulary.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence, make use of linking phrases and transitional words to connect your ideas more smoothly. For example, phrases like 'In addition,' 'Moreover,' or 'On the contrary' could further emphasize the transitions between differing viewpoints.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion by presenting both perspectives on the topic.
task achievement
You've used relevant and specific examples, such as mentioning famous athletes, to support your points which strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clear and contribute well to the overall structure of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial remuneration
  • exceptional
  • merit
  • talent
  • demand
  • entertainment value
  • career span
  • physical demands
  • justified
  • unfair
  • criticism
  • income inequality
  • societal priorities
  • sportsmanship
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