IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some think it is a positive trend, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Introduction
I think companies have the right to
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promote
promot
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promote their advertising
thier
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their
advertisment
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advertisement
advertising
 in
sport
Add an article
the sport
show examples
 industry
Body paragraph 1
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 the teams and every person working in the
besnuies
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beanies
 will
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benefit
benafit
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benefit
 from it
Body paragraph 2
Linking Words
also
Add a comma
also,
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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 think the gambling ads should be limited in the way of
apperans
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appearance
appearances
 on the screens around the
stadeums
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stadium
stadiums
 and it will be better to
band
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ban
show examples
 them.
Body paragraph 3
sports get a lot of
viwers
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viewers
 around the
glob
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globe
show examples
 so
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 important to have a set of
rols
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rules
 that
inssure
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insure
ensure
 the ad will be free from any type or shape of
raicsim
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racism
 or dislicple behaivewr will impact
chilldern
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children
 shallow mental thinking.
Conclusion
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
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there
their
thier
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there
 are many
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benefits
benfits
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benefits
 to
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advertisement
advertisment
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advertising
such
Linking Words
 as inspiring
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people
pepole
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people
 to be
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
healthy and for
chairety
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charity
foundaitions
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foundations
 to have support for
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people
pepole
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people
 in need,
Other
Change the wording
Another
show examples
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positive
postive
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positive
 side is the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of jobs that will be given to workers

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Task Achievement
Structure your essay with a clear introduction and conclusion. This will help guide the reader through your points and make your argument more compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This will improve the coherence and make your essay easier to follow.
Task Achievement
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay by giving concrete evidence for your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity. Regular practice will help in reducing errors like spelling mistakes and awkward phrasing.
Task Achievement
You have addressed both sides of the issue, which shows a balanced approach to discussing the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay touches on multiple relevant points, such as the benefits for business and the impact on society.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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