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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

How should we ensure that television is a positive influence in the life of children?

6.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
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Introduction
Television
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 plays an undeniable role in modern childhood, offering both educational opportunities and potential drawbacks depending on how it is consumed. To ensure
television
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 acts as a beneficial force rather than a detrimental one, active parental mediation and strict
content
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 regulation are essential.
Body paragraph 1
First and foremost, parents must transition from passive supervision to active engagement with their
children
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's viewing habits. Rather than using screen time as an automated babysitter, parents should co-watch programs to discuss the
content
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, helping young viewers critically evaluate what they see. Setting clear, non-negotiable limits on daily screen time prevents
television
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 from displacing critical developmental activities
such
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 as physical exercise, reading, and face-to-face social interaction. Establishing "screen-free" routines,
such
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 as keeping televisions out of bedrooms and turning off screens during family meals,
further
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 protects
children
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 from excessive exposure and sleep disruption.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
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, educational impact depends heavily on
content
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 selection. Parents and guardians should
prioritize
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prioritise
show examples
 age-appropriate, high-quality broadcasting that stimulates curiosity, promotes empathy, and teaches problem-solving skills. Leveraging digital parental control tools and choosing reputable educational channels ensures that
children
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 avoid inappropriate material, violence, or predatory advertising. Encouraging
children
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 to watch documentaries, science shows, or multicultural programs can turn passive entertainment into an enriching learning experience.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
television
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 is fundamentally a neutral medium whose impact is determined entirely by how it is managed. By setting consistent time boundaries, curating high-value
content
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, and engaging in active discussion around programs, families can harness
television
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 as a powerful tool for learning and healthy child development.

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task response
Your answer stays on the main question and gives clear ways to make TV good for children. To make it even stronger, add one short real-life example for each main point. For example, say how a parent can talk about an ad, or name one kind of school show and explain what a child may learn from it.
task response
The ideas are clear and cover both time control and choice of shows. You could also say that schools, TV groups, and the state have a part to play, not only parents. This would give a wider answer to the question.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a very clear order: opening, two main parts, and a closing. Each paragraph has one main idea. Keep this strong pattern in future writing.
coherence and cohesion
Your link words, such as “First and foremost”, “Furthermore”, and “In conclusion”, make the flow easy to follow. You can use a few more simple links inside long parts, such as “For example”, “As a result”, or “Also”, to show the steps between ideas more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Check small writing details. Put a space after the comma in “routines, such as”. This will make the work look more careful and easy to read.
task response
You give useful and direct steps: parents watch with children, set time rules, choose good shows, and talk about what is watched.
task response
The points about sleep, exercise, reading, and time with other people show a good understanding of why TV use needs care.
coherence and cohesion
The opening clearly states your main view, and the closing brings the key ideas together in a clear way.
coherence and cohesion
The two body paragraphs are well grouped: one is about how much TV children watch, and the other is about what they watch.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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