Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantanges outweigh the disadvamtages?
In the present climate, social
media
has gained popularity among individuals. Although
online media
can bring about some merits, I believe that the potential drawbacks such
as physical and mental ailments overshadow the benefits.
One of the main setbacks of social media
can be seen in the physical issues. It means that prolonged exposure to the screen can lead to some diseases such
as eye strain, and obesity. For instance
, the result of conducted research illustrates that the ratio of overweight teenagers in advanced societies is higher than in under-developed ones which can be owed
to overreliance on the virtual world associated with sedentary lifestyles and Verb problem
attributed
accordingly
gaining weight. If not controlled, this
issue can lead to a disaster.
Another potential downside of the mentioned trend can be its tremendous impact on one's mental health. dependency on the online world is highly likely to prone the consumers to various psychological challenges ranging from insomnia to depression. The rate of suicide among students in developed societies can be taken as an example. Surveys elaborate that this
issue stems from the growing rate of depression and isolation linked to eliminated physical interactions and enhanced virtual ones.
On the other hand
, there are some virtues to online media
. The main merit is that it can accelerate task-accomplishment and they are more updated. Nowadays, people can use online media
for various tasks; online banking, and easier communications to name but a few. Moreover
, the data is updated more regularly so users can investigate the latest news via these media
. For instance
, they can follow the Olympic games and their news more effectively compared to traditional news resources. Thus
, it is much faster.
In conclusion, there exist some merits linked to social media
such
as time-saving and accessibility, however
, the handicaps outshine these privileges.Submitted by samirakasraee72 on
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task achievement
While the essay provides a comprehensive response to the task, it would benefit from more elaborate examples to fully support the main points. Try to add specific details or case studies where applicable.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is good; however, make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Use linking words like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'however' to create a seamless flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly stating the writer's viewpoint and summarizing the key arguments effectively.
task achievement
The essay answers the task question comprehensively, addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of social media.
task achievement
The key arguments are clear and comprehensive, making it easy for the reader to understand the writer's perspective.