Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantanges outweigh the disadvamtages?

#people #world #media #touch #news #events #advantanges #disadvamtages

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In the present climate, social

media

has gained popularity among individuals. In order to, keep in touch with each other people are depending on social

media

Although

online

media

can bring some merits, I

Believe

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believe

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that the potential

drawbaks

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drawbacks

such

phsically

Correct your spelling

physical

and

mentally

Change the word

mental

show examples

ailments overshadow the benefits.

Correct your spelling

One

show examples

of the main setbacks of

virtual

Add an article

the virtual

a virtual

show examples

world

phsically

Correct your spelling

physical

issues.

For instance

, prolonged exposure to

screen

Fix the agreement mistake

screens

show examples

can

invite

Verb problem

cause

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

problems

such

as obesity and eye strain which can lately

coused

Correct your spelling

cause

fatal diseases

such

as heart

attack

Fix the agreement mistake

attacks

show examples

.Moving

further

, dependency on the online

world

can

also

elimnate

Correct your spelling

eliminate

physically

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physical

show examples

intreaction

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interaction

. To elaborate

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apply

show examples

, if one

spend

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spends

show examples

exessive

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excessive

show examples

time on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online

media

such

as Instagram,

Snapchat

Correct word choice

and Snapchat

show examples

this

can lead to

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being

show examples

addicted

Change preposition

show examples

these applications

thus

individuals would not try to

intreact

Correct your spelling

interact

with anyone face to face as one find their whole

world

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show examples

a small screen. After

certain

Correct article usage

a certain

show examples

time

this

practise

Correct your spelling

practice

show examples

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

to diseases

such

as depression and anxiety. On the other side, no doubt dependency on

virtual

Add an article

the virtual

show examples

world

can make lifestyles worse . There are,

however

, few merits which can not be

neglectedb

Correct your spelling

neglected

For instance

, social

media

can

bring

Verb problem

show examples

the most effective way to

inteact

Correct your spelling

interact

with your loved one without any restriction of distance.

Moreover

, it can

also

helps

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help

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

stay updated with the news from throughout the

world

. In conclusion,

although

social

media

has some potential that can

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

lifestyles more updated .

However

, overreliance upon

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online applications can lead to some problems that can impact

bad

Change the adjective

badly

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

health for the rest of the life

Submitted by amarbatth367 on Tue Aug 27 2024

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grammatical accuracy

Work on improving grammatical accuracy and spelling to enhance clarity.

task response

Expand on points and provide more detailed examples to strengthen arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and logical progression of ideas.

introduction conclusion

The introduction and conclusion provide a clear framework for the essay.

complete response

The essay attempts to balance both advantages and disadvantages, which shows an effort to address both sides of the argument.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

to connect with friends and family
to preserve bonds
real-time updates
a wide range of perspectives
global happenings
business opportunities
networking opportunities
mental health issues
unrealistic portrayals of life
privacy breaches
identity theft
addiction
time management
productivity

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Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to child's development as other subject, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that news and media have a positive effect on our lives, while others disagree. What is your opinion?

In some countries, owning a home is more important rather than renting one. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?