IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some think that it is better to get information or advice from other people, while others believe one can get any information or advice from the Internet or books. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 argue that it will be better to get
advice
Use synonyms
 or
information
Use synonyms
 from
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
 as friends or family,
while
Linking Words
 others think one can get any
information
Use synonyms
 or
advice
Use synonyms
 by using
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 or
books
Use synonyms
.
By discussing
Change preposition
Discussing
show examples
 with
people
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will
more
Add a missing verb
be more
show examples
 helpful because as social human lives,
people
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 can relate
what
Change preposition
to what
show examples
 we feel or can give feedback
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our
problems
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. On the other sides, sometimes
people
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 do not know how to communicate their
feelings
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instead
Linking Words
 they are trying to find
information
Use synonyms
 from
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 or
books
Use synonyms
 that might be a solution. To start with, as
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
, we can show our
emphaty
Correct your spelling
empathy
 and put our shoes on their
problems
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. It is something that technology, like
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and
books
Use synonyms
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 not have.
For example
Linking Words
, I always go to
psychologist
Correct article usage
a psychologist
show examples
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
 I feel
did
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not well or comfortable with my latest situations. I do
this
Linking Words
 because they can give me some
advice
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 to do. Not only that, but they
also
Linking Words
 can validate my
feelings
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, it is more enjoyable when
people
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 have someone to talk
because
Change preposition
to because
show examples
 they can understand our
problems
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 and give solutions to
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. It
can
Rephrase
cannot
show examples
 be denied that not all
people
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 can express their
feelings
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 or emotions. A kind of
people
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 like
this
Linking Words
 tend to share their
problems
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 or
feelings
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 with
somehting
Correct your spelling
something
 that can not
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
talk,
such
Linking Words
 as
books
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, since childhood, my friend was taught by his parents to not talk about his
problems
Use synonyms
 to anyone. The parents said that he must solve his own
problems
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.
Therefore
Linking Words
, he
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
often
trying
Wrong verb form
tries
show examples
 to tackle his
problems
Use synonyms
 with help from
books
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, everyone has their own reasons why they decide to get
information
Use synonyms
 or
advice
Use synonyms
 from
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and
books
Use synonyms
 or other
people
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. I highly suggest
to
Change preposition
that
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 still consider to search
information
Use synonyms
 from
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 before they go to
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and
books
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Your essay presents a clear discussion of both views and provides a personal opinion, which is good. However, it could benefit from a more explicitly stated thesis in the introduction. Make sure to clearly state your position in the opening paragraph to guide the reader effectively.
task response
You have good ideas, but they sometimes lack development and depth. Try to elaborate more on your points and provide more detailed explanations and examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized, the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Work on creating clearer links between your points and paragraphs to enhance the overall flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, which is good. However, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points more effectively and restating your position in a more impactful way.
language use
There are some minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings in your essay. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, use of articles, and sentence structure. Consider reviewing your essay for language accuracy before submission.
task response
You have addressed both sides of the argument and given your own opinion, which satisfies the task requirements.
task response
Your ideas are generally clear and you have provided relevant examples to support your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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