Some think that it is better to get information or advice from other people, while others believe one can get any information or advice from the Internet or books. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some
people
argue that it will be better to get advice
or information
from human
, Fix the agreement mistake
humans
such
as friends or family, while
others think one can get any information
or advice
by using internet
or Correct article usage
the internet
books
. By discussing
with Change preposition
Discussing
people
, it
will Correct pronoun usage
apply
more
helpful because as social human lives, Add a missing verb
be more
people
can relate what
we feel or can give feedback Change preposition
to what
for
our Change preposition
on
problems
. On the other sides, sometimes people
do not know how to communicate their feelings
instead
they are trying to find information
from internet
or Correct article usage
the internet
books
that might be a solution.
To start with, as human
, we can show our Fix the agreement mistake
humans
emphaty
and put our shoes on their Correct your spelling
empathy
problems
. It is something that technology, like internet
and Correct article usage
the internet
books
do
not have. Correct subject-verb agreement
does
For example
, I always go to psychologist
Correct article usage
a psychologist
everytime
I feel Replace the word
every time
did
not well or comfortable with my latest situations. I do Unnecessary verb
apply
this
because they can give me some advice
to do. Not only that, but they also
can validate my feelings
. In other words
, it is more enjoyable when people
have someone to talk because
they can understand our Change preposition
to because
problems
and give solutions to it
.
It Correct pronoun usage
them
can
be denied that not all Rephrase
cannot
people
can express their feelings
or emotions. A kind of people
like this
tend to share their problems
or feelings
with somehting
that can not Correct your spelling
something
to
talk, Change the verb form
apply
such
as books
and Correct article usage
the internet
internet
. Capitalize word
Internet
For instance
, since childhood, my friend was taught by his parents to not talk about his problems
to anyone. The parents said that he must solve his own problems
. Therefore
, he is
often Verb problem
apply
trying
to tackle his Wrong verb form
tries
problems
with help from books
and internet
.
Correct article usage
the internet
To conclude
, everyone has their own reasons why they decide to get information
or advice
from internet
and Correct article usage
the internet
books
or other people
. I highly suggest to
Change preposition
that
people
still consider to search information
from human
before they go to Fix the agreement mistake
humans
internet
and Correct article usage
the internet
books
.Submitted by wishmeluck on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Your essay presents a clear discussion of both views and provides a personal opinion, which is good. However, it could benefit from a more explicitly stated thesis in the introduction. Make sure to clearly state your position in the opening paragraph to guide the reader effectively.
task response
You have good ideas, but they sometimes lack development and depth. Try to elaborate more on your points and provide more detailed explanations and examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized, the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Work on creating clearer links between your points and paragraphs to enhance the overall flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, which is good. However, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points more effectively and restating your position in a more impactful way.
language use
There are some minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings in your essay. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, use of articles, and sentence structure. Consider reviewing your essay for language accuracy before submission.
task response
You have addressed both sides of the argument and given your own opinion, which satisfies the task requirements.
task response
Your ideas are generally clear and you have provided relevant examples to support your points.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?