IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The charts below gives information about levels of education in Glasgow, a city in Scotland in 2010.

The charts below gives information about levels of education in Glasgow, a city in Scotland in 2010.
#information #levels #education #glasgow #city #scotland
The bar chart despite the information on the proportion of
citizen’s
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens’
show examples
education
 levels in Glasgow, Scotland average by age in 2010. The pie charts illustrate the percentage of
education
 degrees of all citizens and the average by gender in 2010.
It is clear that
 the percentage of citizens who graduate with a high degree was the highest average for 16-50
years
.
While
 the proportion of men’s
education
 levels was higher than women's in 2010. In 2010, The figure of
people
 who had high
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
 in
school
 certificates and university degrees averaged 16-50
years
 old around 91%. the number of
people
 aged 24-35 was
graduate
Replace the word
graduated
show examples
 from university
the
Add a missing verb
was the
show examples
 highest around 76% more than 16-24 and 35-50 by 5%. The percentage of
school
 certificates
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 around 15 per cent in 24-35
years
 old and 20 per cent in 16-24 and 35-50
years
 old respectively.
In contrast
, the figure for
education
 levels of elderly
people
 (50-75) experienced 70% of
people
 who study over than
school
 certificate. And the oldest
people
 study only 28%. The proportion of men
education
 degree was highest than women. Male
people
 graduate from university around 32%.
And both
Correct word choice
Both
show examples
 males and females graduated with
school
 certificates with the same figure
around
Change preposition
of around
show examples
 33%.
Submitted by jeebjib14 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words education, years, people, school with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 5 times.
▼

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage distribution
  • educational levels
  • qualifications
  • higher education
  • school level qualifications
  • no qualifications
  • proportions
  • notable trends
  • outliers
  • age demographics
  • economic conditions
  • social policies
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!