IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things In shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

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In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using
cash
Use synonyms
. All payments may have to be made by card or phone. And some people might not be happy to give up using
cash
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will try to explain.
Firstly
Linking Words
, with the increasing technological developments, everything is changing digitally on a lot of platforms. Even, digital payments are becoming increasingly popular and convenient. Because
this
Linking Words
 is the easiest method. Carrying
cash
Use synonyms
 is hard and not safe.
For example
Linking Words
, any thief can steal your money from your hand,
however
Linking Words
, if you are using a digital card they would not steal thanks to safety regulations.
Moreover
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,cashless societies can improve efficiency and reduce crime.
Hence
Linking Words
, a lot of societies prefer to use virtual cards.
Secondly
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, cashless payments may exclude those with limited access to technology. Because every shopping platform needs an online payment. If you do not have a credit card, you would not buy it. Actually,
that is
Linking Words
 a good opportunity to reduce crime.
This
Linking Words
 brings you privacy.
On the other hand
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, transitioning to cashless societies may lead to job losses in the retail industry. Especially, the workers who work in
this
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 sector would be in a really bad situation. Because
,
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apply
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 they only work with
cash
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. If folks start to use cards rather than
cash
Use synonyms
, they could not work like previous days.
Furthermore
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, some families are not happy to give up using real money. Because
,
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apply
show examples
this
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 really makes you feel like you have spent money and it's gone. Maybe
for
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this
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 reason, they do not like it. In conclusion, somebodies are happy with
this
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, some of them not.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more detailed explanations and examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of your paragraphs to enhance the overall coherence of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use proper transitions between ideas and sentences to improve cohesion.
task achievement
The essay addresses a relevant issue and presents both sides of the argument, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital payments
  • convenient
  • efficiency
  • reduce crime
  • tangibility
  • privacy
  • limited access to technology
  • job losses
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