The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram above illustrates the present and future appearance of Southwest Airport after its renovation in the next year
Overall
, it is planning to set up more amenities that are customer-friendly.
Firstly
, the current layout of Southwest Airport mainly consists of three areas, which are the departures and arrivals space, and the multiple departure gates where passengers await the boarding. Moreover
, we could see that there is a check-in desk for registration and enquiries about the flight. Additionally
, the Cafe
which is also
located in the departures area serves a variety of food and beverages for the passengers.
The renovation plan aims to add more facilities at both sites in order to enhance the convenience of customer services. Starting with the departures site, a place for bag drops will replace the original spot of the check-in desk, and passengers will instead
check in at the opposite bag drop where the cafe
. The cafe
will move to the side of the doors. Furthermore
, the most significant change would be the increased number of gates and the extended gateway along with
the newly-built sky train. There are plans for the addition of an ATM machine, cafe
, and a car hire centre as well.Submitted by annaipsw13 on
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task achievement
Your essay successfully identifies and highlights the main features of the airport's current layout and future plans. However, make sure your introduction and conclusion are more distinct and appropriately structured. A brief conclusion summarizing your findings would provide closure.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all sentences flow logically and smoothly by using appropriate linking words and phrases. For example, words like 'additionally,' 'moreover,' and 'therefore' can help improve the overall coherence.
task achievement
You accurately selected and reported the main features of the current and proposed layout of the airport. However, adding more detailed comparisons between the current and future states could further clarify how the changes will improve the airport.
coherence cohesion
Consider breaking up longer paragraphs into smaller ones to enhance readability and make sure each paragraph has one main idea that is clearly expressed.
coherence cohesion
Proofread for minor grammatical errors and inconsistencies to improve clarity. For example, the sentence 'passengers will instead check in at the opposite bag drop where the cafe.' is slightly unclear, and revising it will help the reader understand your point better.
task achievement
You did a good job outlining the main changes that are planned for the airport, especially mentioning new amenities like the sky train and car hire center.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a clear focus and does not go off-topic, sticking closely to describing the changes shown in the diagrams.
task response
The use of terms like 'departures site' and 'arrivals area' shows a good understanding of the subject matter.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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