Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance such as food and housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that more refugees should be allowed by rich nations and help them with something to eat and a place to live.
This
essay totally agree
with that statement because Change the verb form
agrees
further
human lives can be saved and Correct word choice
more
these man
and women can help in Change the determiner
this man
these men
country's
economy.
One reason for extra refugees must be accepted is that a human life can be saved because of Correct article usage
the country's
this
act. Millions of people has
to sacrifice their Change the verb form
have
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
specially
because of war and they seek help from other countries, their lives are as important as other humans living on Replace the word
especially
this
planet which should be saved at all cost
. Fix the agreement mistake
costs
For example
, US
is accepting additional Correct article usage
the US
run away
Correct your spelling
runaway
peoples
every year to save them from dying in war or from hunger. Fix the agreement mistake
people
This
act of kindness makes humanity alive.
Second
reason is Add an article
The second
development
of the nation by increasing Add an article
the development
a development
amount
of workforce in the market. Every individual who is seeking help wants to be saved and they can do whatever it takes, it doesn't matter if it is a small job, and they Correct article usage
the amount
also
work on low wages which not only helps in inflation but also
decreasing
demand for labour in Wrong verb form
decreases
market
. Add an article
the market
For example
, In Canada each year demand for small professions like electritions
and plumbers Correct your spelling
electricians
are
tackled by helping more people from affected areas.
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
To conclude
, every country should focus on saving human lives rather than watching them die which is not humanity, also
it helps their economy's growth by providing cheap labour.Submitted by MK on
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coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the logical flow between your points. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to improve coherence and cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines your main points which you will discuss in the body of the essay. Your conclusion should succinctly summarize these points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Provide more detailed and developed ideas to support your main points. This will strengthen your task achievement score.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more precise examples and elaborations that directly support your arguments to enhance task achievement.
task response
Your essay addresses both the humanitarian and economic aspects of accepting refugees, showing a balanced view on the topic.
supported main points
You make a strong case by using specific examples, such as the US and Canada, which adds credibility to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.