Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and replace by traditional food preparaation. To waht extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Convenience
food
will be increasingly on
demand and Change preposition
in
eventually
Add a comma
eventually,
people
might replace home-made food
for
canned Change preposition
with
food
. This
essays completely disagree with this
statement because convenient food
has too many conservatives such
salt
that might hurt Change preposition
as salt
people
's health, and this
type of food
has no natural nutrients at all.
One thing that this
essay totally disagree
Correct subject-verb agreement
disagrees
is
that having too much Change preposition
with is
salt
on
Change preposition
in
food
is unhealthy because this
might hurt people
's health, so it is crucial to avoid convenience
food
. To begin
with, convenience
food
might be addictive for individuals because it has artificial flavors
and Change the spelling
flavours
salt
, so for many people
Add a comma
people,
this
is very addictive, and they become obsessive eaters. Beside
Replace the word
Besides
this
, the vast majority of society is suffering from obese
, and many Replace the word
obesity
people
are being diagnosed with chronic diseases. for instance
, In the United States, many people
are obese because they love to buy convenience
food
such
as hamburgers, hot dogs and salty staff
.
Correct your spelling
stuff
Second
point that I disagree with Change the article
The second
this
type of food
is that convenience
food
does not have nutrients to help our body
grow and heal because canned Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
food
is made with artificial products. On top of that, the taste is not the same as organic food
or real food
, so the appearance of convenience
food
is unrealistic and with artificial colors
that might hurt our body system. Change the spelling
colours
to
explain my point, Capitalize word
To
McDonald
Change noun form
McDonald's
adds
are made with plastic meat and carton bread that are painted with Brillant Correct your spelling
ads
colors
to make the add more attractive to customers, so Change the spelling
colours
this
type of food
is unhealthy to see and consume.
In conclusion, convenience
food
should not be consumed by humans to protect their health because it has too many conservatives like salt
, and the ingredients are not naturals
. Knowing Fix the agreement mistake
natural
this
people
might think twice before putting a hamburger in their mouth.Submitted by cuevas14dic on
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Grammar
Ensure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'conservatives' instead of 'preservatives' and 'obese' instead of 'obesity'.
Coherence
Strengthen the logical structure of your arguments by providing a clearer connection between the points made and the main argument of each paragraph. For example, explicitly link the presence of salt and artificial colors to why traditional food is a better option.
Evidence
Provide more specific and relevant examples to further substantiate your points. For instance, citing specific studies or data on health impacts of preservatives in convenience foods will lend stronger support to your argument.
Introduction
You effectively introduce the topic and clearly state your stance in the introduction.
Conclusion
The conclusion succinctly summarises your main points and reinforces your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.