Some people say that we must send our parents to old age home when they reach 60. However other think that they must be taken care at home. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is a privilege to have the company of
parents
even in their later
stage
Fix the agreement mistake
stages
show examples
of life. Some say that
parents
of older
age
should be sent to nursing
homes
.
While
others opine that they should be taken
care
of at their residency.
This
essay will delve into both opinions and will present my own suggestion
along with
a conclusion. In
this
modern era, there are
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of nursing
homes
and old
age
care
centres available
according to
the needs of individuals. People who think that It is best to accommodate their
parents
in the nursing home because of their hectic schedule.
For example
, If a husband and wife both work in some kind of organisation, it becomes very hard to take
care
of their
parents
while
they are at their jobs.
Consequently
, It can lead to a fall or any other injury in their absence.
Hence
, the motive of sending their
parents
to old
age
is quite reasonable.
However
,
this
lifestyle does not fit into other people's life. They believe that
parents
should be taken
care
of at their own
residency
Fix the agreement mistake
residences
show examples
because of the negligence of nursing
homes
they often heard of.
For instance
, there was a news published in "The New York Times" that a resident was found dead in his room because of a fall caused by
slippery
Add an article
a slippery
show examples
floor which was completely ignored by the staff members.
Therefore
, people are afraid of sending their
parents
to old
age
homes
also
they do not want to send them away from their eyes. In conclusion, I believe sending
parents
to old
age
care
has both pros and cons.
However
, depending on
situation
Add an article
the situation
show examples
of a family It can be decided whether someone is available at home to take
care
of them,
otherwise
, nursing
homes
take good
care
of the residents. Lately,
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of improvements have been made to resident's bill of rights so that families can be assured that their loved ones will be well taken
care
of.
Submitted by apskhaira17 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Work on providing more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This will add depth and credibility to your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that all main ideas are clearly and fully developed. Some points could be expanded further for clarity.
logical structure
Strengthen the logical structure by making transitions between paragraphs smoother. This will improve the overall flow of the essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states the topic and sets up the discussion well.
complete response
You have provided a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and provides a final opinion.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: