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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same thing and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss bot these views and give your opinion.

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living
life
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 has many different aspects. Some
people
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 believe that maintaining a routine in their
lives
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 is the best way to live,
while
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 others argue that changing is a must in
life
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. In my opinion, achieving a good balance between routine and change will lead to a healthy and fulfilling
life
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.
This
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 essay will discuss both perspectives. On the one hand, routine in
life
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 not only helps to maintain a clear schedule to follow but
also
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 aids in achieving goals easily and efficiently. Many
people
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 prefer to stick to a clear plan for their
lives
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 without changing, which helps them to manage their time effectively and be more precise.
Moreover
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, following the same pattern in
life
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 can make daily living easier, and more predictable, and reduce stress.
For instance
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, research conducted at Harvard University in 2010 showed that 55% of
people
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 prefer to spend their
lives
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 in the same way without any changes, as
this
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 helps to provide a sense of stability and safety.
On the other hand
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, changing helps to maintain a healthy lifestyle and acquire new knowledge. Change helps individuals to break the routine of their
lives
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 and be more open to trying new things.
Additionally
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,
people
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 who tend to take risks and try to do new activities, are less prone to psychological problems
such
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 as depression and resentment.
For example
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, students who decide to overcome their fear and travel abroad to study, have a great chance to broaden their knowledge, learn a new culture, and become more dependent on themselves.
To conclude
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, maintaining a balance in
life
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 plays a major role in achieving both physical and mental well-being. In my opinion,
while
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 change has positive consequences on one's
life
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, putting a clear plan helps
people
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 to stay on track and to be more productive.
That is
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 why finding a balance between flexibility and stability is crucial for a well-rounded
life
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.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure to maintain clear paragraph boundaries to enhance readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Include more transition words and phrases to smoothly connect ideas between paragraphs.
task response
Try to provide a stronger conclusion by summarizing both perspectives more explicitly before stating your opinion again.
task response
Good balance between arguments for both perspectives, presenting a well-rounded discussion.
task response
Clear and comprehensive ideas with relevant specific examples that support the main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Well-structured introduction and conclusion that frame the essay nicely.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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