Should young people follow older people's example or it is good for them to challenge older people's opinions and thoughts. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #challenge #thoughts

Some individuals say that younger

people

should listen to the recommendations of older ones.

However

, others believe that they have to follow only themselves. I firmly agree that the caring ideas of older

people

could be advantageous for

youngsters

To begin

with, senior

people

have experienced more than younger and know more about life.

Due to

their longer life experiences, they can share their knowledge with

youngsters

to contribute their wisdom.

Also

, the thoughts of older

people

are a vivid reflection of their mindset and perspective that vastly remained from the past. So, to comprehend the past,

for example

, meeting with an older

person

and drinking tea would be a great opportunity for

youngsters

Thus

, they play a significant role in our society as they experience more.

On the other hand

, a young

person

must be aware of his potential that only themselves know better. To be independent, it is believed to let

youngsters

only follow their rules.

This

is an effective way to enhance the self-esteem of a young

person

For instance

, when I was at school, my family suggested I only care the my thoughts .

Therefore

this

mindset makes me more confident and independency.

Nevertheless

, I consider the beneficial outcomes of taking the suggestions of older into account is outweigh the challenges .

This

is because no one is born perfect and everyone makes mistakes. The important part of the mistakes is how to correct them.

Hence

, recommendations of elderly

people

are very insightful to identify and resolve young

people

's issues.

To sum up

Although

listening only to ourselves is essential to build higher confidence, the positive consequences of following elders are valuable and contribute to the

overall

progression of a

person

Submitted by Yasar Khan on Sun Sep 01 2024

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introduction conclusion present

Strengthen the introduction with a clearer thesis statement outlining the main points that will be discussed.

logical structure

Improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph flows naturally into the next. Transition words and phrases can help with this.

clear comprehensive ideas

Expand and clarify some ideas for better comprehension. For example, the reasoning for how older people contribute to young people's success can be more detailed.

relevant specific examples

Include more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This could make your arguments more persuasive and relatable.

complete response

The essay addresses both views of the topic and provides a personal opinion, which shows a complete response to the task.

supported main points

The main points are generally supported with explanations and examples, which helps in making your argument clear.

introduction conclusion present

The conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and restates the writer's opinion, tying the essay together.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Should young people follow older people's example or it is good for them to challenge older people's opinions and thoughts. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience

Some people think that going to a fitness centers regularly is unnecessary. Instead they believe the combining occasional exercise (such as going for walk) with a balanced diet is enough to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing sof skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Band-9 Samples: In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Intelligence is the most important component for leadership. Do you agree or disagree?