In many cities, young people prefer shopping as a form of leisure activity. Why do you think this happens? Is it a positive or negative development.
In the majority of big towns, teenagers consider buying something the best action to do in
free
Correct pronoun usage
their free
time
, because for youngers
is the best choice to spend Correct your spelling
younger
time
with friends quietly and without think
much Change the verb form
thinking
what
they have to do. Change preposition
about what
Moreover
, the setting, when
the majority of shops are located, is so suggestive Correct word choice
where
and
especially in the centre of the city , the town heart. In my opinion is a good activity because youngers can discover part of the city, Correct word choice
apply
walking
in the Wrong verb form
walk
shop
streets, and inderectly
can observe the history of towns. Correct your spelling
indirectly
For
example
I have been in Dublin for 15 days Add a comma
example,
in
a study holiday and after doing a lot of activities, my group and I had some free Change preposition
on
time
so we went to the main street to go shopping, while
we moved from one clothes shop
and another ,in the sinner of small
road near the Add an article
the small
a small
shop
, I heard a strange melody and ,moving in music direction, I found a fantastic group of street musicians with really traditional clothes who sang the best music I have never heard,
after they explained some ancient myths contained in songs. Remove the comma
apply
However
this
trend about
shopping Change preposition
of
have
negative aspects because when you always go out to buy Correct subject-verb agreement
has
somethings
can become a more expensive activity, so we must control it, Fix the agreement mistake
something
for
example
we can substitute some Add a comma
example,
time
with another
free Correct quantifier usage
other
activies
.
Certainly, is an anchor when you are so annoyed and Correct your spelling
activities
activity
also
you wouldn't do nothing
, especially when there are discounts Rewrite the sentence
wouldn't do anything
would do nothing
for example
with my friends I used to go to shop
outlet
near my hometown that always have precious but cheap products which have a perfect proportion Fix the agreement mistake
outlets
Change preposition
of cost-quality
cost-quality
.
In conclusion, I explain why shopping is diffused Correct your spelling
cost quality
in
young people and I consider it a good activity.Change preposition
among
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clear comprehensive ideas
Focus on clearer articulation of ideas. Ensure that each point is thoroughly explained for better comprehension.
complete response
The essay responds adequately to the task by addressing reasons why young people prefer shopping and discussing both positive and negative aspects.
relevant specific examples
The essay includes relevant specific examples, such as the personal experience in Dublin, which enrich the discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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