Most people agree that money cannot be happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define? How can people achieve happiness?

Can money buy
happiness
?
This
is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
huge dilemma, which thrilled and still thrills generations over time.
Although
it could seem a tricky question, the answer is usually unsurprising: money and
happiness
could not be two
further
concepts. The problem becomes tougher when it comes to
define
Change the verb form
defining
show examples
what
happiness
is.
This
essay will point out the reasons behind
this
difficult definition and highlight the way in which people can achieve it.
Happiness
is not a difficult concept per se. It’s a sum of positive sensations and emotions, which usually can be described with the word ‘serendipity’.
However
, what for one individual is
happiness
can be complete misery for another. Indeed, satisfaction in life is something different for everyone.
For instance
, some people may find success and
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
essential to reach
happiness
, some others may consider family the centre of their world and
happiness
.
This
is the main reason why
happiness
is so difficult to define.
Therefore
, a deep consciousness and knowledge of oneself is fundamental in order to achieve
happiness
. The easiest way one can gain it
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is
being
Change preposition
by being
show examples
aware of his or her desires and objectives in life.
This
attitude allows
to
Correct pronoun usage
one to
show examples
focus on improving some specific aspects of oneself.
This
does not mean that a person who is uncertain about goals for the future can not reach
happiness
. It means that it will take a bit longer to do it. In conclusion, even though
happiness
does not seem like a difficult concept to define,
this
essay demonstrates that in point of
fact
Add a comma
fact,
show examples
it is quite so. Anyhow, everyone has the right to define it in a different manner.
Hence
, everyone has the power to achieve it
accordingly
Correct your spelling
according
show examples
to his or her goals.
Submitted by 2001martinap on

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task achievement
While your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and provides a clear argument, there is room for improvement in expanding and detailing your main points. Consider adding more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
To enhance the clarity of your ideas, ensure that each paragraph delves deeper into its main point. This would help make your ideas more comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Try to work on the logical flow within paragraphs to ensure each sentence naturally leads to the next. You can use more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your argument smoothly.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets up the topic and presents a clear thesis statement that outlines the essay's main points.
introduction conclusion present
You conclude your essay well, neatly summarizing your points and reinforcing your argument.
logical structure
The structure of your essay is logical and easy to follow, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • subjective
  • universally
  • cultural differences
  • psychological factors
  • satisfaction with life
  • emotional balance
  • personal achievements
  • social connections
  • fulfilling relationships
  • sense of belonging
  • sense of purpose
  • physical health
  • well-being
  • financial stability
  • mindfulness
  • gratitude
  • positive thinking
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