IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In most of the developing and under-developed countries, well-educated professionals prefer to leave their nations after completing their studies and do jobs in developed countries. What are the reasons behind this problem? Suggest some solutions too.

In most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
third and
second world
Add a hyphen
second-world
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
, it is argued that highly educated workers tend to leave their
countries
Use synonyms
 after finishing their studies and
work
Use synonyms
 in
first world
Add a hyphen
first-world
show examples
 nations. The reasons are because in the developed
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
 have no
corruption
Use synonyms
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
 and
give
Verb problem
provide
show examples
 good
healthcare
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the solutions that
applicable
Add a missing verb
are applicable
show examples
 for those reasons are changing the
work
Use synonyms
 ethic of the authorities and fixing the
healthcare
Use synonyms
 facilities. The main reason for the worker is the
work
Use synonyms
 ethics applied in developed nations where they are no
corruption
Use synonyms
occurs
Wrong verb form
occurring
show examples
 in the workplace.
This
Linking Words
 can
affecting
Change the verb form
affect
be affecting
show examples
 the clear situation for most people who just want to
work
Use synonyms
 in good workplaces.
For example
Linking Words
, workers get clear
insentives
Correct your spelling
incentives
 and bigger salaries because their manager
don't
Change the verb form
doesn't
show examples
 take their money. Another reason is the good
healthcare
Use synonyms
 in the first world
countries
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and Norway where they can get not only better
healthcare
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 free.
This
Linking Words
 will affect them to think of their future living in a better
nations
Correct the article-noun agreement
nation
show examples
.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
 possible solution is fixing the mindset of the authorities because sometimes they tend to
selfish
Add a missing verb
be selfish
show examples
 and
hence
Linking Words
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
corruptions
Replace the word
corrupt
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, Indonesia has the most
corruption
Use synonyms
 cases
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to Singapore and Japan.
Hence
Linking Words
, They created Wissle Blowing System to prevent
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cases where people can report
annonimously
Correct your spelling
anonymously
 to the police or higher management in a company. Another solution is enhancing the
healthcare
Use synonyms
 facilities that can come from the government budgets.
For example
Linking Words
, Malaysia has already established better
healthcare
Use synonyms
where
Correct word choice
whereas
show examples
 people from Indonesia tend to go for medical
checking
Fix the agreement mistake
checks
show examples
 or
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
surgeries. In conclusion, there are reasons why
higher
Replace the word
highly
show examples
 educated workers tend to leave their
countries
Use synonyms
 after
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
show examples
 and do jobs in developed
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
. It is because of zero
corruption
Use synonyms
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
 and better
healthcare
Use synonyms
. To prevent
this
Linking Words
, the government should
changing
Change the verb form
change
be changing
show examples
 their mindset on
corruption
Use synonyms
 and
building
Change the verb form
build
be building
show examples
a better
Correct the article-noun agreement
better healthcare facilities
a better healthcare facility
show examples
healthcare
Use synonyms
 facilities in their
countries
Use synonyms
.

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General
Make sure to proofread for better clarity and grammatical accuracy. For example, 'where they are no corruption' should be 'where there is no corruption'.
Task Achievement
Try to develop each point more fully to provide a more comprehensive analysis. For instance, the essay could further explore the impacts of corruption on individuals’ decisions to migrate.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider improving the transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay, such as using more varied linking words and phrases.
Introduction/Conclusion Present
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the main arguments well.
Relevant/Specific Examples
The essay provides relevant examples, such as the mention of the Whistle Blowing System in Indonesia, which add depth to the discussion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Economic factors
  • Job opportunities
  • Living standards
  • Research infrastructure
  • Career advancement
  • Political stability
  • Social services
  • Exodus
  • Incentive programs
  • Competitive salaries
  • Professional migration
  • Investments in education
  • Home countries
  • Corruption
  • Incentive programs
  • Adequate job opportunities
  • Political institutions
  • Lower crime rates
What to do next:
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