IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

Some people believe that it is good idea to express their point of view and ideas through social media however others believe opposite do you agree or disagree

#people #idea #point #media
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It is becoming a trend
of moving
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to move
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 to main cities from rural areas, all over the world,
this
 essay will explain
express
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and express
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 their point and ideas
social
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on social
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 media
To begin
 with the
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course
couse
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course
, major cities attract people by providing a high
auality
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quality
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education
aducation
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education
 and lots
job
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of job
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opportunities
apportunities
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opportunities
for example
 in
japan
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Japan
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 prominent universities are often located in the city centre Since student tend to live close to their
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school
achool
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school
, the population of the city is increasing
Additionally
, recently conducted by the
ministry
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Ministry
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or
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of
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economy
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Economy
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 in
japan
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Japan
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 discovered that 90%
or
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of
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 big companies are located in
tokyo
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Tokyo
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 and
osaka
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Osaka
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. These companies provide numerous
occupation
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occupations
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 for citizens in rural areas is
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decreasing
descreasing
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decreasing
 significantly, if
this
 trend continues more and more people may
more
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move
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 to primary cities to seek
their
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apply
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job To remedy
this
 issue, I believe that support from the
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government
goverment
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government
 is
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essential
issential
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essential
Submitted by arniaqlina44 on

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introduction conclusion present
It's important to better organize your essay with a clear introduction that directly addresses the topic. A proper introduction should state your position clearly at the beginning.
logical structure
You should ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your paragraphs should connect logically. Transition words can help improve the flow of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Provide a more thorough conclusion to summarize your points and restate your position. This makes the essay feel finished and well-rounded.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay would benefit from clearer ideas and more deeply developed arguments. Make sure to fully explain each point you raise and connect it back to your main argument.
complete response
Your essay should directly address the task more comprehensively. Make sure to cover both aspects of the task by discussing the arguments for and against expressing points of view on social media.
relevant specific examples
You have used specific examples, like those from Japan, to support your points. This adds credibility to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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