IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people find it difficult to speak in front of and to present to anaudience. It is believed that this skill should be taught in school. Why is this important? To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

#people #front #anaudience #skill #school
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A large proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 are shy or introverted and cannot perform in front of
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 crowd
on
Change preposition
in
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 the stadium
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
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fear and bullying. Some individuals argue that it should be
thaught
Correct your spelling
taught
show examples
 in school. I buttress
this
Linking Words
 notion that school has to teach presentation skills.
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At
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In
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 the first stage, all
people
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 will get
job
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 interviews and will be scared of
this
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due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of confidence.
For example
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,
pupil
Correct article usage
a pupil
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have
Change the verb form
has
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 recently graduated
University
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from University
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 and looking for a
job
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 when he
got
Wrong verb form
gets
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 a
job
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 interview he
was
Wrong verb form
is
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 not able to speak
confidentely
Correct your spelling
confidently
confidentially
 and
failed
Wrong verb form
fails
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,
therefore
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, the academies should teach the students some
communicational
Replace the word
communication
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 and presentational skills and take them to speak in front of a crowd.
Moreover
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, confidence is a great thing and will assist society in many aspects.
However
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, for
introverts
Add a comma
introverts,
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this
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 thing will not be so easily accessible and it will take some time to gain. At
the
Correct article usage
apply
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second glance, a human without fear of performance and who has a
job
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 will be more successful at public and international speaking.
Also
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, teamwork with
this
Linking Words
 person will be better and beneficial for colleagues.
For example
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, an individual has a presentation of
project
Correct article usage
a project
show examples
 for colleagues and, he has to inform his team,
therefore
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 he
present
Change the verb form
presents
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 his project without any hesitations.
This
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 type of skill reduces stress and helps a human to speak in front of a lot of
people
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. In conclusion, plenty of
people
Use synonyms
 have challenges to speak and present themselves to an audience. Schools should teach some skills and lessons for not being stressed. I completely buttress
this
Linking Words
 statement that society has to be
thaught
Correct your spelling
taught
show examples
 by
academy
Add an article
the academy
show examples
.
Submitted by tamerlankts on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the prompt, addressing the importance of teaching presentation skills in schools. However, your argument could be more comprehensively developed. Consider expanding on your points with additional examples or evidence.
task achievement
While your essay is mostly clear and understandable, there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrases that detract from the overall clarity. For example, 'pupil have recently graduated University' should be 'a pupil who has recently graduated from university.'
coherence cohesion
Your essay generally follows a logical structure, but the transition between ideas could be smoother. Use connecting words and phrases to link your paragraphs and ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which is great. However, your main points should be more robustly supported with examples and explanations in the body paragraphs.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt directly and provided a clear position on the issue.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Articulate
  • Oratory
  • Elocution
  • Persuasive communication
  • Rhetorical skills
  • Eloquence
  • Confidence
  • Stage presence
  • Audience engagement
  • Non-verbal communication
  • Public discourse
  • Persuasion techniques
  • Presentation skills
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Diction
  • Anxiousness
  • Introversion
  • Curriculum integration
  • Subject mastery
  • Communication aptitude
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