IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Write a report describing the information in the graph below. You should write at least 150 words. Writing task 1.

#report #information
The given chart compares
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the number of
computers
 and
internet
usages
Fix the agreement mistake
usage
show examples
 in Arabian
countries
. The
countries
 consist of nine
countries
 which are Egypt, Jordan, Kuwait, Lebanon,
Marocco
Correct your spelling
Morocco
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, Oman, Saudi Arabia, Syria, and
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 Arab Emirates.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
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 of the country,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will not have a big gap between those two things or even no difference at all.
But
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, there is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 exception where on UAE has a significant amount of
internet
usages
Fix the agreement mistake
usage
show examples
where
Correct word choice
which
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
roughly
doubles
Wrong verb form
doubling
show examples
 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
computers
.
Moreover
, either for
computers
 or
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
,
UAE
Correct article usage
the UAE
show examples
also
 has a substantial difference
to
Change preposition
from
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 other
countries
. UAE has more than 150.000 inhabitants and almost 350.000 inhabitants for the
computers
 and
internet
, respectively.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
show examples
 Egypt and Morocco have the same number of
computers
 and
internet
. In
additional
Replace the word
addition
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,
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
both
countries
 have the same range which
under
Add a missing verb
is under
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a
Remove the article
apply
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half
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 50.000 inhabitants.
On the other hand
, there are
also
countries
 that have more
computers
 than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
internet
usages
Replace the word
users
show examples
. They are Kuwait and Saudi Arabia.
Submitted by rasyidrahma13 on

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coherence cohesion
Introduction needs to summarize the key points more effectively.
task achievement
Review sentence structures to improve clarity and accuracy.
coherence cohesion
Better connect different parts of the essay to enhance overall flow.
task achievement
Provided relevant details and comparisons between countries.
coherence cohesion
Explained the outlier situation in UAE effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Graph, chart, axis, period, timeframe
  • Trend, increase, decrease, growth, decline
  • Stability, plateau, fluctuate, variability, inconsistency
  • Peak, trough, milestone, threshold, benchmark
  • Significant, considerable, marginal, slight, dramatic
  • Explanation, influence, factor, contribution, correlation
  • Projection, forecast, anticipate, predict
  • Surpass, exceed, fall below, remain constant, maintain
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