IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that cities are the best places to live. Others prefer to live in a rural area. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #cities #places #area
Whether living in a city or a rural area has always been controversial. Some
people
 believe that
cities
 are better for numerous reasons,
while
 others think rural areas are preferable. From my point of view, living in a city outweighs a rural area
due to
 job opportunities and entertainment
activities
. One of the most obvious reasons for preferring
cities
 is the job opportunities.
The
Change the article
A
show examples
 large number of companies, factories, and institutions provide
people
 from different fields with jobs. Educational institutions for almost all specialities are available, which help worker improve and develop their skills in which promotions are easier.
Furthermore
, a variety of entertainment
activities
 are found in
cities
such
 as concerts, fancy restaurants, and stadiums.
Hence
, the rate of burnout will probably decrease since these
activities
 match everyone’s preferences.
On the other hand
, rural places are characterized by quietness. The nature and greens contribute to relaxation and meditation.
People
 who live in rural areas are more likely to be calmer and less distracted compared with individuals who are in
cities
.
For example
, the nature of agriculture helps the farmer to touch the grass and release the negative energy. It is important to mention that pollution in a village is significantly lower compared to
cities
due to
 the lack of manufacturing, which many
people
 consider important. In summary,
while
 living in a village has significant benefits,
cities
 provide
people
 with a high rate of job chances and
activities
.
However
, it is crucial to spend some time with nature on vacations and holidays.
Submitted by remasalotaibi678 on

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task achievement
Expand on relevant examples to support your points more convincingly. This will add depth to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas to enhance overall coherence. Linking words and phrases can help in this regard.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong and clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure to your essay.
task achievement
You address both views of the topic and also present your opinion clearly, which meets the task requirements effectively.
task achievement
Your main points are generally well-supported with logical reasoning.

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