In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to the cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In many nations around the globe, rural residents of the countryside are transferring to the big
cities
. The population density of this
area is falling. In my opinion, this
trend is more negative and it brings many side effects for the government
.
First of all, it is better to think about the reasons and then
question ourselves why rural people
are moving to crowded cities
. The major reason is job opportunities. Nowadays, all people
need to get high salaries to give a good response to routine demands for their lives. So, in many countrysides due to
the low cost of living and domestic jobs like farming and other similar occupations, the government
sets a definite payment for these types of people
but in total, this
money is not enough for them. Secondly
, with many facilities like advanced health care systems, a variety of recreational places, advanced education places, and also
different available transportation, people
will be more encouraged to go to the cities
. Although
this
action may be the best strategy to get rid of some main problems
in their first steps, many cities
will face new problems
that involve their lives.
According to
the previous paragraph, many residents in cities
have problems
commuting to their workplaces and usually, they get stuck in traffic during rush hours. Following
this
, traffic congestion and population growth cause much pollution such
as air contamination, water pollution, noise pollution, and other types of contamination that are close to people
’s lives. However
, there are many problems
for individuals, but the government
should set some rules to prevent rural people
from moving to cities
by providing and improving good infrastructure for them.
In conclusion, these days many countries in the world, rural people
are going to city zones. Regarding this
, the rate of population is going to decrease in the countryside. Thus
, I think the government
and organizations should make efficient plans to prepare good conditions for those people
to lower the percentage of moving people
to big cities
.Submitted by brightstargalaxy on
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task achievement
The essay provides a clear response to the task and addresses the key points; however, incorporating more specific examples could strengthen the arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly from one to the next. Consider using more transition words to enhance coherence.
task achievement
Keep an eye on sentence structure and grammar, especially with singular and plural forms (e.g., "countrysides" should be "countryside").
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a well-structured argument with a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
The reasons behind rural-to-urban migration were well-explained, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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