IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

the plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #harbour #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The provided
map
 illustrates the main changes during a 24-year period from 2000 until at present.
Overall
, it is evident that there are eight features which have been constructed, including a new showers and toilets area, a
path
 to the main road from the square car park, a displacement in the locations of fishing boat zone and
marina
, cafes and shops space, a
path
 to the disused castle, a hotel, a private
beach
, expanding dock part during
this
 period. In the former
map
, there was a rectangular showers and toilets area, a rectangular car park with a
path
 to the main road in the northwest of the
map
 near a rectangular
marina
 which belonged to private yachts that in the latter
map
 the locations of the fishing boat and
marina
 is changed with each other.
Furthermore
, there used to be a disused castle in the southeast of the
map
 which at present is converted into a hotel with a specific
path
 to roads which runs to the lifeboat zone. In the latter
map
, the dock area for passenger ferries is demolished to make way for a more spacious dock part.
Additionally
, one of the two public
beach
 areas which was near the new hotel is assigned to a private
beach
. it is noticeable that the
marina
 in the second
map
 is expanded and a new rectangular cafe and shop space was made near the expanded
marina
 and lifeboat part. As can be seen, the public
beach
 on the northeast of the layout and car park
as well as
 showers and toilets have remained unchanged.
Submitted by saharaqajani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay covers all the main changes in the harbour over the 24-year period, but be sure to break down the features in a more structured manner.
coherence cohesion
Try to provide a clear and concise introduction and conclusion to give your essay a polished start and end.
coherence cohesion
Organize your points systematically, perhaps by grouping similar changes together, to enhance the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
You have effectively identified and described the major changes happening in the harbour.
task achievement
Your explanations are generally clear and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Use of linking words such as 'furthermore', 'additionally' contributes to the cohesion of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • harbour (or harbor)
  • docks
  • shipping lanes
  • warehouses
  • recreational areas
  • infrastructure
  • additions
  • removals
  • facilities
  • environmental sustainability
  • economic impact
  • local community
  • capacity
  • technological advancements
  • industrial shipping
  • recreational use
  • surrounding infrastructure
What to do next:
Look at other essays: