Climate change is the biggest threat to life on our planet. How accurate is this statement? Is there any other big threat to mankind?
It is said that
climate
change is now the most concerned
danger to the earth's inhabitants. Replace the word
concerning
This
essay wholeheartedly believes that it is very precise to say that because
an unstable Correct word choice
apply
climate
affects our environment negatively. Another threat to our planet is nothing else but pollution
.
To begin
with, it is true to say that climate
change is one of the biggest problems that species are having to deal with because of the devastating impacts it puts on the natural environment. That is
to say that global warming has caused harsh weather conditions, such
as the ice melting phenomenon in the
Antarctica or more frequent natural disasters, which make it very difficult for many animals to adapt. Correct article usage
apply
As a result
, these animals that are not able to evolve will soon decline in number and meet extinction. For example
, the blue parrot species has recently disappeared from nature since the earth's condition is no longer suitable for them to grow and fertilize.
Futhermore
, human beings are Correct your spelling
Furthermore
also
facing the threat of pollution
caused by our own activities as it is seriously detrimental to individuals' physical well-being. Contaminations from industries and vehicles are responsible for air and water pollution
, leading to a variety of health conditions such
as respiratory diseases or lung and blood cancer, and resulting in an increased number of people who die at a very young age. For instance
, research from the WHO reveals that more and more people are dying before they reach their 50s because of pollution
-related diseases.
In conclusion, climate
change should be seen as the most dangerous risk to mankind because of its devastating effect on everything inhabitats
on earth and Correct your spelling
inhabitants
pollution
is not a less serious issue since its
the main reason for several health problems in today's generation.Replace the word
it's
it is
Submitted by maymocsb on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task effectively by exploring both climate change and pollution as significant threats. However, there are a few small inaccuracies and minor grammatical errors that can be improved for better clarity.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of your essay is generally strong, but working on smoother transitions between ideas could improve readability. For example, using more varied linking phrases can help in this aspect.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your position and sets up the essay well.
task achievement
You have provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, such as the case of the blue parrot and WHO research.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a well-organized structure with distinct paragraphs that each focus on a specific idea.