Some people believe that hard work is vital for success, while others think that education guarantees success more than anything. Which do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.
In the
last
recent years. Some people
think that working hard has more chance to be success
than Replace the word
successful
education
, well I think that it is not all the time, it is not guaranteed like education
in terms of applying to jobs. In this
essay, I will discuss my opinion about this
argument.
First,
why do I think that education
is more important and guaranteed in jobs more
than hard workCorrect quantifier usage
apply
.
Change the punctuation
?
For example
, if you want to apply to
a job they find the best student Change preposition
for
not
the best hard worker so they will refuse your application. Add the comma(s)
, not
In addition
, they try to find people
who have more knowledge like students and according to
the newspapers if you look for
the Change preposition
at
last
years you will find that 95% of people
who have certificate
are more successful in life Fix the agreement mistake
certificates
more
than hard Correct quantifier usage
apply
worker
because they don't have evidence if they know how to work like Fix the agreement mistake
workers
education
people
.
Furthermore
, why
is Rephrase
apply
education
more important is
because they have proof that they learn more than hard workers, it is more professional and accurate and every company can take them to a job, that's why I love to learn in university rather than hard Unnecessary verb
apply
working
.
In conclusion, In my point of view, I think that Replace the word
work
education
is more important than hard working
because of that they don't have proof that they are similar to Replace the word
work
education
guys. In addition
, company's
can take them to their job easily Change noun form
companies
with out
being scared if they don't have the ability to deal Correct your spelling
without
woth
work.Correct your spelling
with
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coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing your essay's logical structure. For instance, introducing clearer topic sentences and better transitioning between ideas can help your argument flow more smoothly.
task response
To improve the task response, ensure that your ideas are fully developed. Expanding on your reasons and providing more specific examples will make your argument stronger.
general
You should aim to minimize grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. This will help in making your essay clearer and more professional. Consider revising and practicing more to achieve greater accuracy.
task response
You have a consistent and clear stance throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, which help frame your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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