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It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#children #difference #right #age #punishment #distinction
“Spare the rod, spoil the child” is one of the most popular proverbs that people often quote when talking about educating
children
 in Vietnam. Personally, I completely agree that punishment in general and corporal punishment
in particular
 are essential to make
children
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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aware of and learn the difference between just and unjust right from the beginning of their childhood
because of
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for
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 the following reasons.
To begin
 with, it goes without saying that, most
of
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apply
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young
children
 do not have enough understanding and knowledge of what is right and what is wrong, and many
children
 are not very obedient. Adults
such
 as their parents and teachers’ reasoning with them does not always work well.
Theorefore
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Therefore
, an arbitrary method, punishment, should be employed to make them learn by heart the line / border between acceptable actions and unacceptable ones. In the second place, psychologically it is widely known that people, including
children
, tend to remember the happiest and most painful moments and lessons in their life the longest. So, sometimes parents have to hit their
badly-behaved
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badly behaved
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 sons or
daughter
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daughters
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 hard to get them back on the right track. Another thing is that nowadays modern life is rife with temptations that can cause
children
 to do wrong things,
such
 as violent video games, online gambling,
harmful
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and harmful
show examples
contents
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content
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 on social media,
for example
 Tik Tok, Telegram, to name but a few. They are so powerful that parents
fails
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fail
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 to stop their
children
 from indulging in them just by using tender words. For that reason,
penalty
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a penalty
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, even a physical one by using a rod, should be applied. In summary, I am absolutely convinced that it is vital for families, schools and other stakeholders to use various measures of punition enabling
children
 to differentiate wrongdoing from
rightdoing
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right doing
right-doing
 at the early stages of their life.
Submitted by phamthienan150395 on

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task achievement
While the essay presents a clear position on the topic, it would be beneficial to include counterarguments to show a balanced view. Consider exploring the negative effects of punishment, especially corporal punishment, and proposing alternative methods for teaching children right from wrong.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using linking words and phrases will enhance the logical flow of the argument. For example, 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' or 'Therefore' can be used.
task achievement
Main points are there, but they can be better supported with more specific examples or evidence. For instance, citing psychological studies or expert opinions on the effectiveness or consequences of punishment can strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of ideas; for example, the first and second main points both touch on the ineffectiveness of reasoning with children. Instead, dedicate separate points to distinct aspects of the argument to cover a broader scope.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a solid framework for the argument.
task achievement
The ideas are clearly presented, making the writer’s position understood. The essay is easy to follow overall.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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