Some people believe that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, believe that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures

Some individuals consider enhanced

sports

facilities the best way to boost public

health

However

, others believe that increasing the number of

sports

facilities does not contribute enough to improving public

health

, and other measures are essential.

This

essay will explore why I agree that being in the option of enhancing

sports

activities will effectively lead

Correct your spelling

progress in public

health

Sports

activities greatly enhance human

health

and are considered an essential part of lifestyle arguments.

Moreover

sports

play a crucial role in preventing diseases

such

as obesity, cardiovascular diseases, stroke, and diabetes. They improve body circulation and mental

health

. The consequences of a sedentary lifestyle, as seen in Gulf countries, underscore the importance of physical activity in disease prevention.

On the other hand

sports

activities are not costly and more enjoyable for most of the youth; students at school can have them at school and in public areas for gyms.

For example

, in Qatar, there are free zones for football, exercise and free gym areas in most compounds and streets, which attracts the public. In conclusion,

while

some people argue that the increase in the number of

sports

facilities is the key to public

health

improvement, I believe it is more crucial that people are educated on how to properly do

sports

This

knowledge empowers them to effectively and efficiently build a healthy lifestyle.

Submitted by holamonem79 on Sat Sep 07 2024

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task response

The essay provides a complete response to the prompt and addresses both views, but more specific details or examples can strengthen the argument. Consider incorporating more diverse examples and possibly some statistical data or studies to back up the claims.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to another. Adding more linking words and cohesive devices could improve the flow of the essay.

task response

Expanding on the provided examples and introducing additional specific incidents or case studies can help to make the arguments more concrete and persuasive.

introduction

The introduction clearly presents both sides of the argument and outlines the essay's intent effectively.

conclusion

The conclusion neatly ties back to the initial argument, providing a clear stance and final thought.

language use

The essay uses appropriate vocabulary and shows a good range of sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

224 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

public health
sports facilities
physical activity
exercise
chronic diseases
heart disease
obesity
inclusivity
participation
safe environment
social interaction
community engagement
comprehensive approach
health education programs
environmental factors
healthcare infrastructure
quality healthcare services
public health initiatives

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Some people believe that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, believe that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

The most important aim of science is to improve our life. To what extent do you agree?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowdays, many people have to work long time, and they feel more stressful than before. What are the reasons? What employers can do to make their life easier?