Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

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The advancements of online systems have been popular recently, resulting in more

people

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interacting virtually than in actual

life

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. In my opinion, the frequent use of online platforms to socialize could lead to detrimental implications in the future because individuals will be less sociable and will experience negative changes even worse, it could trigger crimes. Socializing online is undoubtedly known to be addictive so that drives individuals away from reality because they focus on virtual

life

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This

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can gradually lead to detachment from and ignorance of society as they tend to be secluded.

For instance

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, teenagers who often use social media have many interactions through the internet with their friends, which restricts them from meaningfully connecting with their families in real

life

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since they have become engrossed in online interactions.

Therefore

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, the more obsessive they are, the more they isolate themselves from the real world.

Moreover

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, social media definitely has high accessibility for its users, creating a place where

people

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can commit illegal actions easily. If

people

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simply engage with strangers,

then

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it negatively attracts bad individuals as they could benefit from them in many ways because those criminals will seek

for

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apply

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advantages by wrongly utilizing internet platforms. To illustrate, online site users often feature confidential information or even update their activities regularly, which lures offenders to steal their personal data to be sold to others or used when committing their actions in order not to be caught.

As a result

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, it will affect

people

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's safety by involving them in dangerous situations. To summarize, online socialization only brings negative developments by making

people

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oblivious and solitary about their surroundings and real

life

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as well as

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getting them into serious problems that can happen unexpectedly and heighten the risk of criminal victimization.

hanalyaa29Sat Dec 28 2024

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task achievement

Although your response is complete and addresses all parts of the question, consider elaborating on the positive aspects of online socialization if applicable. This can provide a more balanced view, which often strengthens your argument.

task achievement

While the ideas are logically presented, further development of one or two key points could enhance clarity and engagement. For instance, adding more detail to the consequences of online socializing could provide deeper insights.

coherence cohesion

Try to use more varied transition words to better link your ideas and paragraphs, ensuring smoother flow throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear and strong introduction and conclusion, which nicely frames your argument.

task achievement

Your essay includes relevant examples that effectively illustrate the main points you are making, which aids in task achievement.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is clear, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

social media platforms
online interactions
virtual communication
global community
interpersonal skills
digital divide
cyberspace
virtual presence
social networking
mental wellbeing
digital literacy
safe spaces
marginalized groups
face-to-face communication
socialisation

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Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people think that it is effective for students to study in a group at school, while others think it is better to study alone. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Write a letter to invite friend for the birthday celebration

Study shows that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave prison. Do you agree or disagree?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.